-insert creative blog name-

He's just not that into you.

2012-01-26T00:13:00.000-07:00

One of the most humbling things about 'growing up' has been realizing how often my parents were right, especially when it comes to relationships/boys.

Towards the end of my junior year in high school, I started dating a senior. After graduation, he went away to school, and I was always the one to make the drive so we could see each other. Almost every weekend of the fall semester that I didn't have tennis, I would drive to Logan to see him. Most of the time I would try to justify the situation, but it started to upset me the longer it went on.

When this would frustrate me, my parents would say, "Claire, if a guy really cares about you, he will make the effort. He will find a way to see you." This, combined with years of experience and observation have led me to the (somewhat obvious) conclusion that if a guy wants to date you, he will ask you out. If he wants to see you, he will find a way. If he's not making those efforts, well, he's just not that into you.

I don't want to generalize and say that ALL women put more effort into relationships than ALL men. I think that in general, it has been a trend in my relationships (this dynamic has also been present in several of my friendships, not exclusively dating relationships). This is why I think I need to reiterate this concept to myself. I tend to make excuses for the other person. I explain to myself and others that I have fewer time constraints, or better gas mileage, or a more flexible schedule than the other person, so obviously it makes sense for me to drive/change my schedule/whatever. I don't think this is a bad thing in and of itself, it just leads to imbalance. For example, I have some friends where I feel like I am always initiating contact- always the first to text, message, call, suggest meeting up, or planning something. It kind of gets old.

Anyway, the reason I've been thinking about this is because there are a couple guys I would be... interested in being interested in? I really don't know the best way to word it. Anyway, I'm friends with each of them, other people say, "Oh, he is so into you," I feel like I'm compatible with each of them, and always have a ton of fun when I'm around any of them. And none of them have asked me out! And while this is not true to the same extent for all of them, but I feel a lot of the time like I'm the one making first contact (Yes, Brady. Star Trek. I know.)

Sidenote- I will admit to being kind of obtuse when it comes to distinguishing a date from a one-on-one platonic hang out, especially if it is someone I definitely consider a friend. So, I now tend to just assume platonic hang out unless the word "date" is explicitly used in plan making. With that being said, I suppose something could have been considered to be a date to them, but I was unaware...

What I'm getting at is this: apparently, these guys are just not that into me. (And that's fine, you aren't required to be interested in someone just because you're friends. I have guy friends, like Gabe, that I have a great time with, and hang out with ALL THE TIME but am not interested in at all. ) This post is in no way intended to garner pity or beg for dates. (What's the point of any blog post though, really? Why am I using all these random colors, by the way? I think it's for when I go on random tangents, but I can't be sure.) I'm not crying myself to sleep at night over any of this. I really am just trying to remind myself to have this mindset. I've heard the chorus of excuses for why someone wouldn't be asking someone else out before- don't want to ruin the friendship, too intimidating, the timing is weird, fear of rejection, whatever. The point is that if they don't like you enough to get over it for the chance to date you, they don't like you very much at all. And if they don't like you very much...why, again, are you worried about it?

Did that make sense, or was that just one giant round of circular logic? Guys, certainly tell me if I've got it all wrong.

Procrastination Rant

2012-01-24T00:41:00.000-07:00

Yet again I have a ton of reading to do, but I'm too mad about a certain topic to do it until I rant it out.

The hypocrisy of some conservative ideals astounds me.

In particular, I am referring to so called "pro-lifers."

The Republican party is FULL of people who would deny life saving medical abortions to mothers who will die without them. The GOP currently has potential presidential nominees who would outlaw contraception, would outlaw abortion even in the case of rape. I have heard elected Republican officials say that they believe you cannot be a truly religious person if you are not pro-life. The general Republican public considers Planned Parenthood to be a baby killing factory.

And yet...

Did you know that most abortion clinics have to have escorts to protect women leaving their clinics? Did you know that doctors who perform abortions receive death threats, and that abortion clinics are bombed? Or, did you know that when abortion is made illegal or is severely restricted, abortion rates don't decrease? Abortions still happen- they are just the unsafe back alley abortions that kill women.

Pro life, indeed.

Let's also add in that it is overwhelmingly conservatives that support the death penalty. Now, I already know what you are going to say. "Claire! Those people chose to do awful things and now must face the consequences. Those aborted fetuses are innocent little babies! They didn't do anything wrong and MURDER! Aborting fetuses is MURDER!"

Let's pretend for one quick moment that our justice system is perfect, has no racial bias, and convictions are always 100% correct. (HAHA as if.) In this alternative universe, I am still against the death penalty. I'll get to this in just another second.

It is also overwhelmingly conservatives and Republicans who believe, as a general philosophy, that killing people is a way to solve problems. In this, I am referring to the "Let's just bomb them!" mentality. It is almost exclusively from the right that I have seen the sentiment expressed that the best way to solve conflicts in the Middle East is just to bomb it into oblivion, or the idea that it is useless to wage counterinsurgency, or to worry about civilian casualties is an absurd waste of time. (There was literally an article in Foreign Affairs about how our best option in dealing with Iran is to bomb them. In case you need convincing on why this is a bad thing, read Bill Keller's NYT piece here) Shockingly (/sarcasm), I take issue with all the above stances.

Why? I think I have absolutely no place determining the value of another human being's life. Absolutely none.

I'm not an idiot. I know that, for example, my mom cares more about me being alive than an Afghani insurgent. And I know that some people contribute more to society and the world than others do. I know that in, for example, times of war it is necessary for some to take the lives of others. What I do NOT believe or condone is the justification of any of these attitudes based on the idea that some people deserve to live more than others.

Let's go back to the death penalty. It amazes me that most of the ultra-conservatives who vehemently support the death penalty are deeply religious- and not only religious, mind you, but some sort of Christian. So, let me get this straight. You (hypothetical religious Republican) believe in the atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ? You believe that His grace is sufficient for all? In many circumstances (depending on sect) you believe that this grace will cover everyone, regardless of whether they know of, acknowledge, ask for, or accept it? Yet you believe that someone's choices can strip from them their God given life? The God I worship, He loves everyone equally. You know what that means to me? It means He loves me just as much as he loves the Afghani insurgent, the serial killer, and the stripper. I'm unaware of the scriptural passage where it is noted that God loves you more if you are a white Christian American.

So, returning to why I'm pro-choice if I believe so strongly in the sanctity of life.

First of all, I have no problem saying that I don't know if I would ever get an abortion unless it was in the circumstances of rape or for my health. If someone came to me, I doubt my first line of advice would be for them to get an abortion. I still firmly believe that it is every woman's right to choose for herself whether or not she wants to carry a pregnancy to term. People who say, "Oh, just carry it for nine months and give it up for adoption!" can seriously... ugh. Pregnancy is not easy. Women get really seriously sick and almost die from being pregnant all the time. It permanently changes your body, even in a fairly easy and painless pregnancy, and can alter your body in very significant ways if it was a hard one. There have also been studies that show that giving a child up for adoption takes more of an emotional toll on women than choosing to have an abortion. Not to mention that white, healthy babies are much more likely to be adopted, leaving minority babies, or babies that have poor health because the health of the mother was bad, to the foster system.

Let's also consider the fact that we have the technology and resources to make abortions all but obsolete. We have contraception, condoms, and morning after pills, all of which would prevent pregnancies and abortions at the same time. BUT guess who consistently and routinely makes sure these resources are unavailable? The conservative right wing. These are the people that don't want anything but abstinence taught in schools. These are the people that want to outlaw contraception. These are the people that continually try to defund institutions like Planned Parenthood that work to provide contraception to people that are unable to get it elsewhere. Let's also consider the fact that many women simply cannot afford to have a child, or additional children, and we all know the Republicans don't want to help them out with that. Abortions? They're on you, conservatives.

Reminiscing- Mom visits London and Wales!

2012-01-21T01:31:00.000-07:00

I was looking through some old photos today... I remembered that I never really blogged about when my parents came to visit me in Edinburgh. In my defense, I was stressed out TO THE MAX when my parents visited for about a billion reasons, and when I came home...well, I was miserable.

So, here's a quick recap and some photos.

Less than 24 hours after Danny and I got back from Poland, I took a train to London. The train ride was gorgeous- along the eastern coastline for most of the trip. I then took the tube to meet Averyl- stayed at her apartment until the next day when I picked up my mom.

My mom and I toured around London for two days, went to Wales for two days, then were back in London for two days. Our hostels were SOOO sketchy. All the other hostels I've stayed in (London trip 2009, Skye, the Highlands, Krakow, Ireland) were way better than these places. They were great locations, and we even paid extra to have our own room, but wow. I didn't get any pictures of this, but we also went to War Horse on the West End. AMAZING!

LONDON:

This is a wall outside the National British Museum- it's a replication of a painting (A Van Gogh, I think) that's made out of plants! PLANTS! Way cool.

We stopped by a military academy... This horse was pissed.

Behind me is 10 Downing Street, where the Prime Minster lives. My contact lens decided to dive bomb out of my face approximately 3 seconds before this picture was taken.

My personal favorite photo of my entire 3 months, I think. There was tons of construction around Big Ben/Parliament, and it was super hard to get a good shot. We finally stood here, but my mom kept waiting to get a picture until there would be no one in the background. (IMPOSSIBLE!) I got frustrated, obviously.

Statue of Queen Bouddica. When we lived in England, we lived near where she...lived? Died? Can't remember. Obviously significant. Haha.

One night we went to Romeo and Juliet the ballet. We thought it was going to be the Royal Ballet- nope. It was kind of modern, with no set. Kind of weird, but the building was gorgeous.

One day we went shopping at Covent Gardens, got lots of touristy stuff, there was an insanely delicious food market...but the highlight of my day was discovering a LADUREE! I could have cried.

Liberty Market- Original Tudor building, totally gorgeous. We could've shopped there all day.

After a long day of shopping, we randomly chose a pub for some traditional fish and chips. We chose well- best fish and chips/mushy peas of my life.

Millenium Bridge (featured in Harry Potter and the Order of the Pheonix... the dementors break it.)

Mom, with Kate and Wills.

This was the sleeper train we took from London back to Edinburgh. It was so tiny, our luggage barely fit.

WALES- the windiest place on earth with the worst food ever.

Wales is pretty, really it is. People are wonderful and nice and welcoming, it's gorgeous. BUT... the food is awful. Seriously, worst couple meals ever, except that time we just had Diet Coke: Citrus Zest and digestive biscuits. Also- most agressive seagulls I've ever encountered. I almost cried.

Welsh is a crazy language.

The smallest house in Great Britain! We had to pay 10 pence to get in- worth it.

My mom has an obsession with owling. She made me do it all over- this is her owling in the smallest house in GB.

In Conwy, we went to a tudor house that was set up as it would have been in the 15-16th centuries. It was one of the best self-guided tours I've ever been on, the guide tape was really entertaining and informative. It was totally decked out too, the stuff in the kitchen was real (this is rare, most use plastic food.) It just made me sad to see dead bunnies.

Conwy has the oldest intact fort walls in GB. I felt like doing this in the rain- this happens a lot when I wear hoods.

At the top of a tram ride in Llundundo Junction- aka windiest place on earth.

More owling.

Llundudno Junction from the boardwalk.

Um. I want to go to bed. More pics later.

Platonic.

2012-01-17T19:08:00.000-07:00

I have this formal dinner at BYU this weekend. It's a Scottish Burns Supper, a huge Scottish tradition where you celebrate Robert Burns, the poet. You eat traditional Scottish food, there's a little poetry reading, men in kilts, hopefully some bagpipe music, and potentially some Celtic dance performances. I miss Scotland and Scottish culture so I'm really excited to go, but I've run into a little problem.

I have two free tickets. This means I need a plus one. I wasn't originally planning on going with anyone, but since my entire internship group has each been given two tickets, I'm just assuming that everyone's coming with a date, and I refuse to be by myself in this situation.

I have a policy that I implemented after high school- I will not, under any circumstances, ask someone out on a first date. Nope. This may have led to a few lame Friday and Saturday nights, but I just refuse. This leads me to a logistical problem. I've been on a grand total of 2 first dates in the last year. One of them was with my now ex-boyfriend, and the other was with Alfred- so not happening. (Tip for future dates of mine- Don't tell me I'm too smart to be liberal.)

This leaves me with the platonic-friend-drag-along.

The distance from Logan to Provo has led me to rule out pretty much anyone from up here. Gabe has offered to come if I need him, but I am certain that he will have ZERO fun, as he finds all things Scottish vaguely ridiculous and unappealing. It's a really long drive and dinner, so I would feel super guilty for dragging him that far to something he wouldn't enjoy. Also, not sure he's my most BYU appropriate friend. He'd probably insist on a bottle of whiskey beforehand or something so he could get through it all. Brady now has a girlfriend, and I doubt she'd let me borrow him for a night. (But Jen! He'd be in Provo and then you could have him back, and you wouldn't have to feed him! Haha.) I even considered just dragging my cousin to it, considering he just got back from his mission and I want to hang out with him anyway, but he won't be in Provo until February.

My friend Bruce and I had this pact in high school- if either of us had a date planned but couldn't find someone to go, we were each other's back up date. He's married now, which negates the pact, but I need something like that! I need a new platonic date pact! Until then, I might just have to drive to the closest liquor store for some bribery whiskey.

Man of the House

2012-01-12T12:35:00.008-07:00

Hopefully my reputation can withstand the following revelation- I've lived with men before. That I'm not related to. Two of them. At the same time.

One of them was gay, though, and the other one might have been, considering he always complimented my outfits, loved bubble baths, and hosted several tea parties. (The last one could have been an English thing, and I'm actually sort of mad at myself for stereotyping.)

Anyway. Living with guys is kind of nice, if they are the clean. Lem cooked a lot, was nice and quiet, and never made a mess (and often cleaned up ones he didn't make.) Paul wasn't as tidy- he somehow managed to cause a tidal wave every time he entered the bathroom we all shared, but other than that he was extremely pleasant.

In my apartment at USU last year, we sort of had a male roommate. My roommate's boyfriend was over at our place ALL THE TIME. Slept, showered, did laundry, cooked, ate, played video games, did homework, everything. He kept his desktop computer there. We made him pitch in on dish soap and paper towels.

Male roommates come in handy sometimes. They take out the trash. They reach things for you off of tall shelves. They hang things on the wall. Sometimes they move heavy furniture. Very rarely, they will take pity on you and scrape the ice off of your car. But most importantly, they open jars of pasta sauce.

Side note: When situations like that used to arise, I would proclaim, "This is why I need a boyfriend!" However, when I did have a boyfriend, I don't think he did any of those things. I mean, I'm sure he would have been happy to do them, but the occasion just never arose because we weren't living together. Male roommates. Seriously.

The current lack of male roommate-esque personage recently led to an interesting experience. I was making tortellini, and could not open a jar of pasta sauce. I had opened the jar the night before with no difficulty. I ran the lid under hot water for two full minutes. I had Tori try and open it- she tried to pry it open with a knife (nope), ran it under hot water for another minute (nope), banged it against the counter (nope), and tried using one of those grippy plastic thingies (nope). Devil sauce!

Finally, we decided we were just going to have to go to the guy's apartment next door. Tori thought it would be funny if we just handed whoever answered the door a jar of sauce, assuming they would know what to do with it. I have the worst poker face ever, so she said she would do it.

He did not know what to do with the jar of pasta sauce.

"Ummm... Thanks? What's this for?"

Tori stared at him in disbelief.

I finally answered, "Uh... we need you to open it."

I didn't hear this part, but apparently he replied, "What if I don't want to?"

Tori responded with a withering glare.

He popped it open in a fraction of a millisecond. "Here you go... You seriously couldn't get that open?"

This time we both glared before saying "Thanks!" and running away.

And this, ladies, is why we should have male roommates.

Oops.

2012-01-11T15:50:00.000-07:00

My day of my first classes started out normal. My first class ended and Gabe announced, "It is a two coffee day!" so we had to swing by the student center so he could get himself a refill. We walked over with Tori, and chatted for a second before Gabe hustled us away saying we had to get to class.

On the way, we passed another friend, Tim. Again, stopped and talked for a minute, and again, Gabe was worried we'd be late so we left after a very brief conversation about Tim's impressive "Christmas beard." We get to the room, a small auditorium, and notice that it is so packed, people are sitting in the aisles and standing near the door. We still see empty seats, but they're in the middle of the row where you have to climb over people to get to them. "Screw that!" we decide, "I'm not standing around for an hour and a half." So we find a spot and I climb over 2 people, an empty chair that I leave open for Gabe, then two more VERY DISPLEASED freshman looking guys.

I settle in, look up to the front (where the professor has been talking this whole time about his late work policy) and see that the screen has ECON 1500 on it.

We're there for GEO 3100. Obviously, this is a problem.

I look at my phone and realize... it's only 11:33. Class doesn't start until NOON. Apparently, we got out of our last class really early. I look over at Gabe, who is also slowly realizing that something is wrong.

The following conversation is held in hushed tones across the two displeased freshmen.

Gabe: "What is going on? This is the right room!"

Claire: "Gabe! Class doesn't start until NOON!"

"What?! I thought class started at 11:30, that's why I was freaking out!"

At this point, I am barely containing my laughter. It was just so hilarious- no wonder Tori had been kind of confused when Gabe insisted that we had a class "right now!" And this explained why Tim was perplexed when Gabe was getting antsy and said we had to run after a 1.7 minute conversation. And it all made sense, that people were staring scornfully when we walked past the people sitting and standing in the aisles to get a seat- didn't really make sense to walk in 15 minutes before the class ended and laboriously struggle to climb over people to get to a chair.

"What do you want to do? I can't just climb over these guys again!" I said, hoping that they would say something like, "Oh, it's no problem. Go ahead." (Hint- they didn't.)

(In typical Gabe fashion) "Pfft. I don't care! I'm not sitting in here for half an hour! I already took this class! We're seniors- we do what we want! People can't judge us, and we're never going to see this room full of freshmen again." (Or something to that effect)

So we, again, climb over people to get to the aisle, practically run out the door, and burst into laughter.

The Laaaaaast Semester

2012-01-10T21:15:00.000-07:00

Wow, is that weird.

On Monday, I started my last (hopefully!) semester at Utah State University. How crazy is that?

I only have one class on Monday evenings- It's a graduate level class on European Intellectual History. I'm not entirely sure what, exactly, that is, but my favorite professor is teaching it and he recommended that I take it. There are 8 of us total, and I know the two other undergraduate students. We've been in classes together before, and I don't feel too inadequate around them, but they have both been in grad classes before. It's pretty much the first time that I've been genuinely intimidated by my peers in a classroom. The professor and I have a good relationship, though, and I have a fairly good background in European History (as I've taken every single class he teaches, besides his Modern Germany class) so I think at the end of the day, I'll be alright.

My Tuesdays/Thursdays are a bit busier. Somehow, Kendra talked me into taking a 9 AM institute class. When you consider that I genuinely had a hard time waking up for my 10:30 AM class last semester, I don't know how successful this is going to be, but I'll certainly try my best! I'm awaiting your judgment, because we're taking Preparing for an Eternal Marriage. Haha! I seriously can't really figure out why we're in it, especially considering that we sit at the front row of every church meeting so we don't have to watch couples be all PDA-y at church.

My next class is my senior research capstone. The professor is AMAZING- I've had her for two previous classes, one of which was the hardest class I've ever taken. I'm pretty sure the A I got in that class should automatically grant me an entry level CIA position or something. We're going to be studying US strategies in counterinsurgencies, specifically in Vietnam and Afghanistan. I've studied COIN in her classes before, so I feel pretty prepared for it- and I have it with two of my best friends, Gabe and my roommate Tori. It's also held in the Political Science Library, so we get to sit at a round table with big comfy chairs. (The grad level history class is held in the History Library, so it's the same deal. Senior classes rock.)

Wow. I'm sort of bored of this post.

Gabe and I then have Natural Disasters, which we're taking to complete the Depth Physical Science credit. It seems like it's going to be awfully boring and simple. I was talking to Danny last night and he goes, "Wow, you really take a lot of classes about people dying, don't you?" And it really is true. So many classes about people dying. (The professor introduced our counterinsurgency class as, "Well, this is going to be bloody.")

Last class is... oh, I'm so ashamed. Its "Comparative Cultures" USU 1320, a Breadth Humanities credit. I promise I have taken all of my generals, and I probably have roughly a million humanities credits. USU has this annoying policy that you have to take two USU prefix generals. Honors generals count towards this- or so I thought. Apparently, only about half of them count, as I found out last semester a week before I had to sign up for classes. Since I already had all my generals, I could take literally any class from any section- Humanities, American Institutions, Creative Arts, Physical Science, Life Science, etc etc- but decided to take this section because of the professor- the same one I have my senior counterinsurgency class with, and have had International Relations and Strategic Culture from. It is going to be a disaster, as it is filled with a bunch of freshmen who are NOT Humanities majors (as they would fulfill the Humanities requirement with a class that is also required for their major, and therefore not a USU prefix class.) What have I gotten myself into?

I have some hilarious stories from today, but this post is really long. So, I'll tell them next time. I also think it's high time I throw in some politics, what do you think? Muahaha. :)

Holidays 2011

2012-01-05T02:05:00.001-07:00

Overdue holiday post!

For college students, let's be real, the holiday season starts the moment your last final gets out till your first class of the next semester. I had a day or so to just veg out and watch inordinate amounts of Community. Kendra and I then drove to St. George with her parents and another friend to go to Kendra's cousin's bridal shower. Basically that took a grand total of 2 hours, and we just went to family parties and movies and In-N-Out the rest of the time. Kendra's family is HILARIOUS and totally made me feel included- I even got Christmas PJs. It was so much fun.

I also got go to lunch with Danny and the Bairds (Daniel and Mandi). I haven't seen Mandi and Daniel since we were all in Scotland, and I have missed them terribly! I miss being their third wheel. We went to Gourmandise to catch up, and Daniel was amazed by the wall of French desserts.

My family headed up to the cabin and I stayed in town to be able to go to Mandi's baby shower. First, I spent the night at Klorisa's new (to me) apartment. I feel like we haven't hung out in a really long time, but we had a way fun time catching up at The Pie. Her apartment is also really cute- she used to live in a sort of terrifying part of town, so I'm way glad she's moved!

Mandi's baby shower was really fun- most people were family, and it was really strange because I'd heard SO much about them from Mandi, and I'm pretty sure they had no idea who I was. The food was good, and I was really honored to be included. I sincerely consider my friends from Scotland some of my best friends. I wish we could all see each other more!

I eventually headed up to the cabin for Christmas festivities. My family has received some bad news this season, so it was nice to just have a low-key celebration and spend time together. The low-key hanging out continued on home, hanging out, watching movies, dinners, etc etc.

I also ran to Kendra's house for a 24 hour excursion- her mom, her mom's best friend (Peter), Kendra and I went out for Thai food, the Ken and I attempted to go spend her Christmas clothes money. We then went to a wedding reception, dinner, and to War Horse. Then her mom made me breakfast and sent me home with a loaf of banana bread and Thai food leftovers. I love them.

For New Years, I went to a "black tie" party in Ogden with Kendra, Klorisa, Klorisa's fiancé Neal, her roommate Jordan, Josh, Braden and a bunch of Josh's other friends. It was actually a lot more fun than I think any of us expected it to be.

Now I'm back home, and Kendra and I have apparently REALLY missed each other because this is currently happening:

Yes, we moved our mattresses downstairs for a sleepover. Face masks, trashy tv... all we're really missing is a McDonald's run. It's only 1:58 AM, so I guess you can't count us out yet.

Hope you all had a wonderful holiday season!

(Only political tangent, I promise- can you believe Romney won Iowa after essentially tying with SANTORUM? Bahahaha. Seriously, the guy who wants to outlaw contraception. I can't even...)

Ahlstrom 2032

2011-12-13T23:58:00.000-07:00

Instead of writing our East and Central Europe papers, Gabe and I are planning out our presidential election campaigns, and the smooth transition from the Lopez to the Ahlstrom administration.

Lopez 2024, Ahlstrom 2032!

Gabe's plan is to become the youngest president ever, having run at age 34 and turning 35 after being elected. He will appoint me to be Secretary of State, as I will be a year too young to run as his vice president. His administration will be so successful that his endorsement will allow me to slide into the White House after his 8 years. He will then become my Secretary of State- which is probably the coolest job in the world. Let's be real, that's the job we really want, not President.

We're still looking for Vice Presidential running mates...top of the list at the moment is our East and Central Europe professor. I mean, that is totally not meant as a bribe so we don't have to do this paper at ALL. I'm tentatively considering Jon Stewart (who would be 70 at this point, but vice presidents don't so much anyway, and everyone loves him...), and Gabe is thinking he would like a female running mate, one who is preferably older than him by 5-20 years. Personally, I think Senator Kirsten Gillibrand is a viable option.

Oh, my... I'm never going to get this paper done. Quick- were Eastern Europeans full participants in deciding their own fates after generations of subjugation? Aaaah!

Rant alert.

2011-12-07T19:51:00.000-07:00

Today, I'm feeling pissed off at the world.

It probably feels like that happens a lot, and it does. I mean, I'm a religious, politically active, liberal, female living in Utah. I study the Holocaust every single day. Nationalism, foreign policy, strategic culture, ethic cleansing, genocide, current affairs. There's sort of a lot going on in the world that pisses me off.

First thing- The new Rick Perry video, Strong. Feel free to watch, weep for our nation, then go dislike the video and flag it as hate speech.

I saw this comment on it:

As a Christian, I’m offended by this video.

Later this evening, I’m going to go to my church, which is decked out in full Christmas regalia, to practice for our Christmas cantata. I will be one of many, in many churches, not only in my town but across America. No one is persecuting us. No one has passed a law saying we can’t worship as we wish. The only thing that anyone’s said, is that it’s probably bad form to shove our Christianity down the throats of the millions of Jewish, Muslim, Pagan, agnostic and atheist people that we share space with in any given day.

Let’s also not forget that no one is forbidden from praying in school, they’re forbidden from public, mandatory prayer in schools. Which, by the way, Jesus himself preached against: “Whenever you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray while standing in synagogues and on street corners so that people can see them. Truly I say to you, they have their reward.” (Matt. 6:5)

That assumption; the callous, idiotic assumption that because Christianity doesn’t rule and dominate all American life it is somehow oppressed, irritates me. My faith is neither so small or so fragile as to demand such concessions.

I doubt you can hear me, but I'm giving this commenter a slow clap.

First of all... "There's something wrong with this country when gays can serve in the military but children can celebrate Christmas or pray in school." That statement is very obviously framing gays serving in the military as a bad thing... and that pisses me off. I have not yet heard one valid argument for why gay people should not serve in the military. NO discrimination based on sexual orientation in civil society. Period.

Secondly, Obama's War on Religion? What are you talking about, you crazy rambling oaf? There is no war on religion. When someone refers to something as a "Holiday tree" or when someone says "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas" it doesn't mean that they are trying to take away your right to believe what you want. It means they are being inclusive and recognizing that, hey, not everyone in this country celebrates Christmas. "But they are taking Christ out of Christmas! Jesus is the reason for the season!" you whine. Well, what if you are Jewish? Or atheist? Or Muslim?

But seriously, how on earth is Christmas under attack? I mean, does the semester not break here for a convenient winter break that coincides with Christmas? Do we not all get that day off of work and school? I mean, McDonalds isn't even going to be open. The entire country recognizes Christmas.

AAAAAaaaaand.... Mr Rick Perry, sir... are you aware that Obama actually considers himself Christian? Ok, good. Wouldn't want you to think that because he's not white or Republican he's also not Christian. Ha...ha...ha....

Finally... It really pisses me off that he says he's going to stop liberal attacks on religious heritage. He frames the situation as if one cannot be liberal and religious, which is just straight up wrong.

I had other things to rant about, but I have a study session in 15 minutes, and I feel like this is long enough. Feel free to comment and tell me how you feel about this video.

I'll end with this quote from Jon Stewart... "If there has been a war, Christmas is the aggressor nation. Right now, every public space in the country looks like it got hit with a five hundred pound tinsel bomb. The White House looks like a Yule Tide episode of Hoarders. Many of these displays are subsidized by, uh, what's that think you don't want to spend on anything...Tax payer money!"

I love him.

And I lied, I'm really going to end with this: a hilarious list of things people would rather see as president than Rick Perry. I support this.

Christian Bale as Batman

Two paperback copies of Catcher in the Rye duct-taped together

Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King: Extended Edition on Blu-ray

A bowl of warm spinach and artichoke dip

A 12 pack of Diet Cherry Vanilla Coke

A shoelace.

Arrrggmmmmrrrf.

2011-12-05T08:25:00.000-07:00

That's the noise my brain is making.

Anyway, I was up till 3 ish AM listening to one of those interviews for my Oral History paper (due at 2:30 PM). I knew I needed this interview (a summary sent to me by the director of the program said "This person talks about how she reconciled being communist and being Catholic" which was exactly what my paper needed) but it hadn't been available any of the times in the past week or so that I tried to get it. Finally, after camping out in the course reserves room for HOURS, the guy working thought it was sort of suspicious- the library was about to close, and all course reserves can only be checked out for 3 hours- we'd been there for 5.

Yeeeeah. It had been restocked wrong. (Is that a word? It seems weird) Anyway, I was allowed to check it out right at 11:45 ish...but it had to be returned before 8 AM. So rude.

After I finished the interview, I went to sleep on the couch till 6:45. When I need to wake up early, or am only getting 3 or 4 hours of sleep, I usually sleep on the couch and leave the pantry light on. It makes it easier for me to wake up. Believe me, when I'm in my warm, comfy bed, and my brain is tired, I can talk myself out of getting up for hours.

Now I'm in the library... still haven't started my paper.

BUT. Here's what I was thinking. I really really need a Diet Coke... because it is wonderful and cures all ills and has caffeine, BUT it is also freezing in the library, so I want hot chocolate to keep me warm.

Thought- I wish there was something that was warm AND had caffeine.

Realization- There is. It's called coffee.

Crap.

Diet Coke it is.

Wish me luck... or laugh at me and say I deserve it. Either way...

Pro in Procrastination

2011-12-04T18:06:00.003-07:00

Jon Huntsman was in my Sunday School class today.

Not really...but Kendra and I walked in and were trying to decide where to sit when I saw him out of the corner of my eye. Apparently, one of the high councilmen looks a LOT like Jon Huntsman. It startled me. I turned to Kendra and whispered, "Kendra. Look at that guy. I thought it was Jon Huntsman!" She laughed at me.

Anyway, my weekend was extremely lame. On Friday, I came home from school, changed into my sweats, and fell asleep while watching an episode of Community. I woke up, made waffles (and by that I mean I put some Egos in the toaster) and fell back asleep. Woke up again, researched pepper spray laws in California, and answered my uncle's pleas for thoughts on Ron Paul on Facebook.

Then I couldn't fall asleep again until 4:30.

Then I slept in until 3:30.

Then I watched some more Community. I seriously get NOTHING done during the weekends. It's a disease.

Finally got ready and went to Gabe's work Christmas party. I was promised fun games, awesome prizes, and gift cards. It was all a lie... but it was a free meal, and Gabe and I are probably the most hilarious people I know, so it was still fun. Everyone that worked at the center had to introduce themselves and their guest. He joked, "Should I introduce you as the girl that has refused to marry me 6 times?" Gabe has jokingly proposed to me multiple times because he wants me to be his "sugar mama." Or, he wants to be on my parent's health insurance. Always practical reasons. Anyway, after the party I got back and was going to go to the library and be productive, but spoiler alert, that didn't happen. I painted my nails, though. And watched more Community. And ate popcorn. And watched half of Dumb and Dumber when Trin came over at 1:30 AM.

Procrastinating is such hard work.

Things I must accomplish before the semester is over:

Oral History Paper

Finish reading "Auschwitz, Poland, and the Politics of Commemoration"

French book report

French object paper

Write research paper for my Foreign Policy class

Write Honors Thesis Proposal (!!!!!!!!!)

Finish reading the Second Treatise on Government

History of East Central Europe final

Economic and Cultural Exchanges of the Pre-Nineteenth Century World Final

Foreign Policy Final

French Medieval Literature Final

Political Theory Final

Oh dear, we are in trouble.

(A million points to whoever gets that reference. Please please please.)

Ok, for real I am going to the library now.

Don't judge me.

2011-12-01T23:14:00.000-07:00

Ok, this post is about a pair of shoes.

Wait! Don't leave yet!

They are basically these shoes, but grey and suede. I got them on KILLER sale whilst Black Friday shopping. I wore them today all over- to school, to Alfred's apartment (Kinect boxing? Possible in heels. Soccer and volleyball, not so much), to a Pi Sigma Alpha (Political Science honor society) event, then to the library.

Not my best choice. Fergie- you make a cute shoe...but you are a sadist and must hate your fellow women.

I did ok for most of the day, but I have two blisters. I had to take them off to walk from Old Main (where the PSA event was) to the library (where I have been listening to interviews of Czech immigrants for hours). Let me tell you, that was a lose-lose situation. There were rocks everywhere and it's Logan in the winter. Freaking cold. Shashank was laughing his head off at me. Just now, Gabe and I went to go to the cafe because he wanted some orange juice, and the muscles around my ankles were literally cramping up.

I formally rescind my lifelong mantra of "fashion over function." These shoes are now officially church shoes, which makes me really sad because a grand total of 9 people complimented me on them today... and I only knew 4 of them. They are hot shoes. Sigh.

I feel like I need to say something important and substantial in this otherwise fluffy post... Or maybe just balance it out.

Oh! I'm in the process of choosing an NBA team. Any input would be greatly appreciated. I'm sort of leaning towards the following 4 teams

Boston Celtics
Chicago Bulls
Oklahoma City Thunder
New York Knicks

I would tell you my pros and cons for the teams, but that would defeat the purpose of including this sportiness in the first place. (I hate the name Carmello and the color yellow. Also, the C in Celtics should be a hard "c" sound not a soft "c" sound. And who even cares about Oklahoma? It's a lame place to be from.)

Um. I'll just go now.

St. Andrew's Day

2011-11-30T16:55:00.000-07:00

Happy St. Andrew's Day!

(It's Scotland's national holiday...)

I've been missing Scotland a bit recently. Most of it is probably missing "Team Scotland-" Danny, Mandi, Daniel especially, but even though I wasn't very close with him, Brenden too. Heck, even my roommates- Lem and Paul. (Haha.) I miss hearing the accents. I also really miss the contrast of being able to enjoy "big city life" and also have some of the most spectacular scenery in the world really close by. I'll be honest, Edinburgh isn't the most happening of places-stores close even earlier than in Logan most of the time, for example. BUT there was also cool stuff to go do! Botanical gardens, museums, ceilidhs, fairs, parks, historical spots, tours, etc etc. Sometimes it feel like all there is to do here is go out to eat, or watch a movie. Ok, and basketball games.

I'm sure part of it is also that I'm stressed with school, and in Scotland I did not have to stress about school. Scotland was a no-school zone for me.

Aaaand finally- Scotland is just so pretty!

Anyway, enjoy some pretty pictures I never posted- taken when my parents came to visit.

My dad and I at Stirling Castle

My parents and I at Glencoe

Failed jumping picture.

I did lots of "owling" while my mom was in town. She finds it hilarious.

Eilean Donan Castle

Grounds of Balmoral Castle, the private Scottish residence of the monarchy

St. Andrews, birthplace of golf and Will and Kate's love. Aww.

I'm pretty sure I want to retire here.

Where Prince William and (now) Princess Kate Middleton met for their first date.

View from Edinburgh Castle

Cafe where JK Rowling wrote the first Harry Potter book

Debating chamber of the Scottish Parliament

So, my Scottish friends, drink an Irn Bru and eat some haggis for me. Cheers!

I've never been prouder.

2011-11-30T16:18:00.000-07:00

So, my Thanksgiving break.

I got my hair done Wednesday- died it red. Not to be dramatic or anything...but when I got home, I bawled. It was basically maroon, which was pretty much exactly what I did not want. (It's better now, maybe I'll take a picture on a day I wasn't up till 4:30 AM and actually took a shower because I didn't sleep through my alarm until 10 minutes before your quiz started...)

Anyway, I also got to see Danny that afternoon (I was uber lame, tired, and definitely not entertaining...), then some friends from high school came over that evening. My mom cracks me up- she seriously bought a veggie tray, spinach artichoke dip, fancy crackers, 7 layer dip, and made punch. Thanks, mom! I got to meet my best friend's fiance, and give my approval. (He is literally the first guy she's dated that I wholeheartedly approve of. I have excellent taste.)

Thanksgiving was pretty typical. The mashed potatoes were excellent, but the showstopper in my opinion was the butternut squash with sage butter. Oh my. I want some now. Only one of my conservative and argumentative uncles was in attendance, so there were no showdowns. Shame, I've been feeling feisty lately.

I actually spent most of Thanksgiving day passed out on the couch/my sister.

Good thing though, because I had some hard core Black Friday shopping to do! We left the house at about 9 PM and returned at 6 AM. The J. Crew employees officially dubbed us the best shoppers of the night. It was one of the proudest moments of my life. I might have a trophy made for myself.

Friday, I got to hang out with Brady, who I haven't seen in a super long time.

Other than that... I got absolutely nothing school related done, watched an entire season of Community (hilarious!) and really missed my bed... which is also attached to my own room and bathroom with excellent water pressure. Also Kendra. I missed her too.

Weekend Highlights

2011-11-20T22:56:00.000-07:00

Do you think it would be possible to get a doctor's note saying that I am physically unable to get out of bed before 9:40? Because, seriously, I think I might be. That sounds so ridiculously late and lazy, I'm aware, but let's remember that I also never go to bed before 2... and sometimes my roommates stay up in the living room watching "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" till 5 AM.

We'll get to that.

Friday I took a Foreign Policy exam in which I wrote a treatise about why drone warfare is so bad for our national interests. Right before we took the exam, a group got up and gave a presentation on drone warfare, in which the cons (of which there are MANY) were discussed for about 1 minute before they were dismissed, "Well, all those reasons are basically dumb because the terrorists hate us anyway." Ok, Mr Simplification, sure, the terrorists hate us, and freedom, and apple pie. The point of a counterinsurgency is to win the hearts and minds of the local population, and to keep people from joining the insurgency. You cannot kill your way through a counterinsurgency. OH, DRONE WARFARE PISSES OFF THE LOCAL POPULATION AND INCREASES RECRUITMENT FOR TERRORISTS. In sci-fi movies, how do you know who the evil people are? They send machines to kill people. Star Wars. Star Trek. Terminator.

Sigh.

Kendra and I also went to a stake social on Friday. Ice cream sundaes... and we almost died walking up our snow covered hill to get to the Institute building. It was sort of a bust. Eventually there was a pretty good turn out, but there weren't a lot of people from our ward.

Then... we went with one of our other roommates to Breaking Dawn. I was completely entertained...but not in the way I was meant to be. It was so utterly awful. Why did I go in the first place? I'll be honest, I actually suggested it. I knew Kendra really wanted to go see it, and I haven't been to a movie all semester, so I probably would have gone to Big Fish or The Master of Disguise (aka the worst movies of all time) if it meant I got to have some popcorn. But honestly... I was cracking up through the whole thing. I can't even explain it. Ok, I'll try.

The weird flashback about how ~~Cedric~~ Edward used to murder murderers and rapists that really had nothing to do with anything
The pre wedding nightmare
The look on Kristen's Stewart's face as she's walking up the aisle
The awkward "look at this wedding dress!" shot
The 20 minute long wedding kiss
The painfully uncomfortable wedding toasts
The 40 minute long Volvo commercial
I cannot even talk about the ridiculousness that was the entire honeymoon
The wolfpack fighting in the lumberyard...with their minds
The "imprinting" scene where a 18 year old werewolf falls in love with a 2 hour old vampire hybrid baby
The line Edward says about how the wolfpack can't kill the baby because Jacob is in love with her- "It is their greatest law." *Serious face*
The part where it shows you how the vampire venom is healing Bella- who looks like she just got out of a concentration camp.
Aaaaand of course, the whole not so subtle pro-life "CALL IT A BABY!" campaign.

And Kendra says *I* ruined it. Please.

On Saturday Kendra, Dena (another roommate), Trin and I met Jackson and Byron at another Aggie basketball game. It was intense, but we won. High fives all around. Word of advice, don't tell Aggie basketball fans to be quiet. They will not appreciate it. Anyway, we had awesome seats, Row 4. Normally where the band sits, actually. Legit.

We eventually met back at our apartment and ended up playing Mario Kart for... hours. Dena's friend Simon came over. We love him- he's English, which we just all have a weakness for, I suppose. Simon was asking us some random questions about the church- I think we were discussing inactivity vs having your records removed from the church? Funniest part of the night- Kendra was explaining the difference and called someone a hellion- and Simon goes, "Wait... you call non-members HELLIONS?" And we died laughing. DIED. It probably helped that it was around 3 AM at this point.

This is also when Tori and Ian came back- and they decided it would be a great idea to watch "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" Kendra and I decided that was a good point to call it a night- but everyone else stayed up (in the room right below mine... where the tv is also right below my bed..) till 5.

College. *Head shake*

Today: Church, tithing settlement, sat around waiting for our home teachers, waffles, saw my family for 10 minutes, watched Thirteen Days for my Foreign Policy class and became a bigger fan of JFK.

Only 2 days of school this week. I love.

Free meals

2011-11-17T15:05:00.001-07:00

Last weekend, Gabe took Kendra and I out for sushi for my birthday. Well, he took me out for sushi and Kendra out for substandard teriyaki- because Kendra does not like seafood. Especially raw seafood. Anyway, it was delicious and awesome. One of the rolls was delivered, and I quote the menu, "with actual fire." ACTUAL FIRE!

Another free meal? Last week, I went to a USU Democrats meeting. We had croissant sandwiches with pesto mayonnaise, fruit and veggie platters, cookies...and of course, Diet Coke. Democrats sometimes have this reputation for being pretentious snobs...and the pesto mayonnaise is not helping that image, especially when you contrast it with the USU Republicans, who always have pizza at their meetings. But seriously, that pesto mayonnaise was spectacularly delicious.

Another free meal? At work on Tuesday, I won a gift card to Cafe Rio. There was a box wrapped in layers of newspaper- whenever you got a pledge, you got to tear a layer off. Whoever tore off the last layer (me!) got the prize inside. Cafe Rio gift card, box of Mike and Ikes (promptly gifted to Shashank at the library) and a box of Skittles (used to keep Gabe and I sane as we sat in the library for hours copying interviews of Czech and Slovak immigrants to the United States).

Upcoming free meal? Even though today is my last day at the Aggie Connection Phonathon (sadface) I am still planning on attending Monday's Thanksgiving dinner party. Ever since I started working at the Phonathon in January, I have heard tales of this legendary feast. One coworker has even described it as "better than my family's Thanksgiving dinner." Now, maybe her family's Thanksgiving dinner plays out like a bad movie scene, with lots of fights, tension you could carve with a knife, and burned dried turkey disasters, with a few drunk uncles thrown in for good measure. In that case, I wouldn't doubt that the Phonathon dinner would be better. I'm still preparing to be amazed.

Another free meal? Date number 2 with 'Alfred' last night. Actually, that sounds really awful to classify it as a free meal...like I'm one of those girls that gets asked out by someone she has no interest in, but turns to her roommates and laughs, "Oh well, at least its a free meal!" Not the situation, I promise. It's just that... this post is about free meals... and... I mean, I ate. For free... so... Anyway, I will leave a more detailed recap...If you ask nicely. Is that me blatantly begging for comments? Yeah, pretty much. You guys spoiled me with 5 comments on my basketball post, then I got NOTHING on my Penn State post. Rude.

Here's the thing, Penn State...

2011-11-14T16:42:00.001-07:00

If you are rioting in the streets and flipping VANS over, for heaven's sake, in support of a man who turned a blind eye to child rape...

I think you are a horrible person.

It honestly makes me sick that people are rioting in support of Paterno, that McQueary is merely on academic leave... Ugh! Since when is protecting the institutions of college football more important than protecting children!? It.is.disgusting. This situation is vile.

Obviously, Sandusky is the most to blame. But he was enabled for YEARS by the institutions of Penn State football. McQueary witnessed him raping a young boy in the showers. He didn't try to stop it. He didn't call the police. He called his dad, who told him to tell Paterno. Paterno, in turn, informed his superiors- saying that McQueary had witnessed "fondling or some other sexual act." Again, NOT the police. A janitor saw Sandusky raping a child- he didn't report it to anyone. Didn't try to stop it. Didn't call the police.

I don't care if it is technically legal to just tell your superiors. You call the police. That is so messed up.

This was covered up for over a decade to protect the legacy of Penn State football and the individual careers of those involved. I really don't care who you are- your job is not more important than the safety of a child. A FRICKEN FOOTBALL program is not more important than the safety of a child.

I think the people rioting in support of Joe Paterno are disgusting. Paterno is not a scapegoat. He is not a victim of the scandal. He enabled a child molester and rapist for years- and people are pissed he's fired.

I really cannot comprehend it...

Occupy...the Spectrum

2011-11-11T14:19:00.000-07:00

Since Wednesday, USU students have been camping out in order to get seats for tonight's basketball game against BYU. The event, organized to prevent the problems with people rushing the line at our last BYU game, has been called "Occupy the Spectrum."

I take issue with this...

I mean, I get it. I get that they are trying to be witty...trying to draw some sort of parallel. I mean, we're people in tents, too, right? But I find it pretty insensitive to those that are actually suffering (police brutality, the elements, etc) trying to enact some sort of political and social change. It's delegitimizing to the actual OWS movement, because it is trying to equate getting good basketball seats to a legitimate political and social protest of the exploitative, irresponsible, and corrupt aspects of our economic system.

I'm not hugely upset about it. I just think it is evidence of USU campus' widespread dismissal of the OWS movement and mocking, condescending attitude it has towards any perceived liberal movement. I don't really expect any better.

All that being said- tonight I am attending my first ever Aggie basketball game. Let's go, Aggies!

Stats

2011-11-10T01:23:00.000-07:00

Am I the only person that checks their stats on blogger?

I don't know why I asked that, I know I'm not.

Anyway, I noticed something... something strange today. One of my top referring sites?

Goliath Labs....Muscle Growth and Bodybuilding Supplements.

I'm confused. Befuddled, bewildered, perplexed. I mean, look at the website. I sort of feel the need to shower now and scrub all the *bleeech!* off me with a loufa. luffa? loofa?

Also, more South Koreans and Spaniards read my blog than Poles. What do I have to do to make Poland love me as much as I love Poland? I talk about Poland all the time, but I'm pretty sure I've never mentioned South Korea or Spain. Strange.

Finally, my post on how to not get raped and/or murdered has finally been overthrown... by my post on the Isle of Skye MacBackpacker's Tour post. Do we think this is significant?

I really shouldn't blog past midnight.

I promise...

2011-11-09T14:07:00.000-07:00

that someday, I will return to actually writing posts that don't just tell you a list of random things that have happened since I last posted.

These posts will probably involve me crying about the fact that Herman Cain doesn't know that China has had nuclear weapons since the 1960's... or that my Foreign Policy class thinks that it is oh-so-hillllarious that he is still leading the polls despite the many accusations of sexual harassment/assault. Hardy har har har, maybe Perry should get someone to accuse him, then his ratings will shoot up! Ha ha ha ha vomit.

Anyway.

Over the weekend, I went bowling and got tendonitis. I'm a wimp. Also played The Michael Jackson Experience and Dance Central on the Kinect. SO. MUCH. FUN...and I am an awful dancer with no rhythm or hip movement, so if I like it, everyone can like it. (This also made me miss the Bairds...)

Aaaand now my Foreign Policy class is discussing which US Presidents have had mistresses. I... ugh. This is awful.

Deep breaths.

Oh, so you know those two weeks where I had 1200 pages of reading, 5 midterms, a quiz, and 4 papers? Well, I got some of those grades back...and woah, guys.

French Midterm: 98%

Political Theory Midterm: 96%

East Central Europe Midterm/Papers: 96%

Foreign Policy Paper: 100%

Foreign Policy Quiz: 95%

So. Moral of the story. Put Heavenly Father first, and He helps you prioritize. There is seriously no way I should have been able to finish all the readings, do all my papers, and still do this good on my exams. The amount of studying I did for that French midterm? 25 minutes. I left my Political Theory class 15 minutes early, and used the 15 minute break between classes. That's it. I also was able to do all of my Honors Contract (outside project I work on with a professor to earn honors credit for a non-honors class) reading and get a lot out of it, and have a really good discussion with my professor about it. He even asked me to talk about it the next day in class.

What else...

Today I signed up for my classes next semester. I'm not super excited about it, but oh well.

USU 1320- Breadth Humanities

I'm taking this because my university requires you to take 2 of your breadth classes as a "USU" prefix class. Why? No idea. I only took 1. I decided to retake a Humanities (even though I have so many of them) because the professor is actually one of my favorites- she taught my Introduction to International Relations class and my Strategic Culture class. She's a phenomenal lecturer, so at least I won't be bored. Hopefully.

ENVS 3600- Living with Wildlife

This class fulfills my Depth Physical Science class. Pretty much all of the options sounded awful to me, but two of my roommates have taken this and said it's way easy. Apparently we learn a lot about sea turtles (the prof's area of expertise, apparently) and take a hunter's safety class, then go to the shooting range.

HONR 4900- Honors Senior Thesis

Just me. Researching and writing about Memorializing the Holocaust in Post-War Poland.

HIST 3330- Soviet Union and its Heirs

I love Eastern Europe and it sure beats taking "Russian Economy from the 9th century till present."

HIST 6XXX-Intellectual History

I'm taking a graduate level history class from my favorite professor. I've taken everything else he teaches (he's also my honors contract professor and will be my thesis advisor) and he offered to allow me into the class. It should be good...lots of reading, though.

Final randomness: I was quoted in our school newspaper today. That is all.

Quick Update

2011-11-03T17:14:00.000-06:00

This week has been a little crazy- I don't think I've ever been assigned so much reading in my life! I had a total of 690 pages of reading, plus a midterm this week. Is that a lot? It's the first time I've actually counted up my reading across all my classes, so maybe it isn't as bad as I think, and stress is just making it seem like more than it is...

Random updates:

Last weekend was fun... and also unproductive. I went to Ballet West's Dracula with my sister and parents. It was AMAZING. I don't know how to explain it... it was unlike any ballet I have seen before. The costumes, the choreography...there was even some flying. My only qualm- why must the hero of the ballet have the most awful outfit? Frederick was wearing fuchsia tights and a fuchsia vest. The rest of the "townspeople" were in brown, red, or orange. Like... normal colors.

On Saturday, I met Danny at the Scottish Fest in Salt Lake City. It was kind of a disappointment. I was expecting something like the Celtic Festival I went to in Dalkeith, but it was just held in the 1st Presbyterian Church, so there wasn't a lot of room. Tori was in SLC with her family, so they stopped by and Tori hung out with us for a bit. We watched the Highland dancing competition, but it was just the same 30 second segment over and over again. We did eat some good food, though. Danny I went to check out the Cathedral of the Madeleine a block away... because that's what we do- we wander into churches. I worked in that area during the Corroon Campaign, and always wanted to go inside, but never did.

Despite the lackluster nature of the Scottish Fest itself, I still had tons of fun. I was with Danny- how could I not?

I also decided NOT to quit the honors program. I had been thinking about it, because I'm way behind on the thesis process... but I talked to one of the professors I have a pretty good relationship with (we're doing an honors contract now) and we figured something out. Drumroll... How the Holocaust has been memorialized in Post-War Poland. I think it's going to be good, and it works really well with all the stuff I've done in his classes (my East/Central Europe class with him right now is the 4th class I've taken with him).

What else... oh... I gave my 2 weeks notice at my job. I'm already pretty overwhelmed, and deciding to do the Honors thesis means about 10 extra hours of research a week. Luckily I have awesome and supportive parents...and a full ride scholarship.

Um. Not as quick as I had originally intended. Oops.

Have a good weekend! I'm working... and going to be productive, I swear it!

Milestone

2011-10-27T18:00:00.014-06:00

On Monday, I went on my first post-breakup date.

*Names have been changed to prevent Facebook stalkage by my extended family members. All fake names were chosen by roommate*

It was really random. I showed up to FHE 15 minutes late, and it was already ending. It was my group's week to do the devotional at the... "old folks home." Is that PC? Probably not. Their website says, "Assisted Living Facility"

Anyway, I got there and all the...folks... were filing out of the room. They all kept asking me if I was Melanie (our FHE Pa's fiancée.) Only Steve (FHE Pa) and Alfred showed up. We stood outside and chatted for awhile, then Steve asked if I had my own car to get home, or if I needed a ride with him and Alfred (they're roommates.) I said I was fine, but then Alfred just turns to me and goes, "Hey...want to go on a date?"

I said, "Sure!"

And so... we did. He and Steve had carpooled, so I had to drive, but he was like, "Don't worry, I'll still pay."

The original plan was ice cream, but the place he wanted to go was closed...but conveniently located next to Cafe Rio. We ate dinner, then I drove him home. It was short, but I think that was just because it was spontaneous and random so there wasn't really a plan... and we both had papers to write.

Random-It came up that I lived in England, so he insisted that we speak in English accents the rest of the night. I'm not very good at being silly if I don't know someone very well, but I figured I didn't have anything to lose...and I have a pretty impressive English accent. I watch a lot of BBC.

I don't feel like I'm that awesome at dating (haven't had a lot of practice), but I had a lot of fun. Alfred is really funny, there were no awkward silences, and I felt really comfortable around him. I'm one of those people though, that doesn't really like someone until I've gone on a few dates with them. I can be interested in someone, but it seems like a waste of time to actually like them until you've at least gone on a date or two, because 99 times out of 100, they don't ask you out anyway. So.... yeah. Not sure if anything is going to happen with Alfred, but I'm glad he asked me out!

*McDonald's update* Um, yeah. Tuesday night, Trin, Kendra and I ran to McDonalds. Trin owed me 4 bucks and I didn't want to cook. Immediately after we ordered, Kendra goes, "Wow, I really want McDonalds now..."

So after we got our order, we drove through...again...

Save us.

Fear not.

2011-10-26T18:00:00.005-06:00

So, on Sunday I gave a talk in Sacrament meeting. I haven't given one since I was 17... and I was nervous. I am honestly so jealous of guys who have gone on missions and are so skilled at giving talks. They can wing it, they can improvise. Me? Noooo. No, I cannot. If I don't plan ahead, I go off on these tangents and I might throw in way too many cliches and it is just not pretty. So...I have to write everything down or practice it a million times. For example- My ward has this joke- one guy bore his testimony the first week and took off his glasses, saying that if he couldn't see us, he would less nervous. It's been a running joke since then. I opened with a continuation of that, how I hadn't given a talk since I was 17 and that caused me to overreact in impairing my eyesight so I couldn't see everyone- I got an eye infection! etc. I practiced it in my head about 80 times during Sunday School. Anyway, I'm just going to post it...

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A few weeks ago, Brother Frank asked me to speak today on my favorite talk from General Conference. As I was rereading talks, trying to narrow it down, I decided that I was just not going to be able to pick one. I took some liberties with the assignment and I’ve decided to focus on a theme I found running through several of my favorite talks- how we can be happy. In his talk, Elder Perry said, “We believe that it is possible only through Christ to find ultimate contentment, hope, and happiness.” That's the short answer...

Repentance leads to happiness- I know a lot of the time we think of repentance with a little dread or shame. Repentance can hurt, but, as Elder D. Todd Christofferson said in his talk, “Any pain entailed in repentance will always be far less than the suffering required to satisfy justice for unresolved transgression. Whatever the cost of repentance, it is swallowed up in the joy of forgiveness. Only repentance leads to the sunlit uplands of a better life. Repentance is a divine gift, and there should be a smile on our faces when we speak of it. It points us to freedom, confidence, and peace. Rather than interrupting the celebration, the gift of repentance is the cause for true celebration. The divine gift of repentance is the key to happiness here and hereafter. I know that in accepting the invitation to repent, you will find joy both now and forever. ”

That is a promise! If we truly repent, we will have joy in our lives now, and forever. He’s not asking us to be perfect- He’s asking us to become perfected through repentance and the Atonement, and promises us eternal happiness if we can do so.

Part of the happiness that comes from repentance is recognizing that we are so completely loved by our Savior. What can make us happier that knowing that someone loves us as much as He does? In Elder Bennett’s talk, Choose Eternal Life, he stresses that, “It is never too late to begin to choose eternal life.” Christ doesn’t give up on us. He is always waiting patiently for us to choose to follow Him. This line reminded me of that picture we see of Christ, where he’s knocking on the door, asking to be let in… but there isn’t a doorknob on his side of the door. We have to choose to let Him in, choose to follow Him. This idae was also expressed in Elder Uchdorf’s talk entitled, You Matter to Him, where he outlines 4 divine principles that demonstrate how much our Father in heaven loves us. In explaining the last two principles, he says, “No matter what, you are not invisible to your Heavenly Father. He loves you. He knows you. What you see and experience now is not what forever will be. You will not feel loneliness, sorrow, pain, or discouragement forever. We have the faithful promise of God that He will neither forget nor forsake those who incline their hearts to Him. The most powerful Being in the universe is the Father of your spirit. He knows you. He loves you with a perfect love. He sees you as the being you are capable and designed to become. He wants you to know that you matter to him.” Elder Hales reiterates this in his talk, saying, “Every one of us is more beloved to the Lord than we can possibly understand or imagine.”

How can we have knowledge of those principles and not have happiness in our lives?

One of the main ways the gospel has brought happiness and joy into my life is that it casts out fear. When we truly trust in the Lord, we have no reason to fear because he will direct our paths. It is easy to be scared. It is easy to worry that we won’t be happy in this lifetime if we aren’t married by 23, or if we choose the wrong graduate school, move to the wrong city, pick the wrong thesis topic. It is hard to give up your control, to say to yourself that you are going to follow Heavenly Father’s plan for you no matter what. But when we do- there is such peace that comes from knowing, as Elder Uchdorf said, that if we are doing our best, with our hearts inclined towards Him, all will be well. This peace doesn’t just come because we know that if we do make the wrong choice- not even in the sense of sinning, but in choosing the wrong school or something- it will eventually work out, but also in knowing that if our hearts are turned to Him, if we are seeking His guidance in earnest, we are much less likely to make the wrong choice in the first place.

Fear and confusion doesn’t just occur when we’re making important decisions. In Elder Hales talk “Waiting upon the Lord: Thy Will Be Done” we learn about following the will of our Father even when we don’t understand our trials and challenges. Elder Hales quotes Doctrine and Covenants 122:7 when we are promised that all things shall be for our experience and good. He then details times we might not understand our trials, but then quotes one my favorite scriptures, Psalms 30:5- “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.” There are times in our lives where we will experience suffering. We will be sad, we will be confused, we will weep. We will have legitimate fears, concerns, and sorrows. But we are promised that this will end. Elder Hales follows this by saying, “In the dawn of our increased faith and understanding after a trial, we arise and choose to wait upon the Lord, saying ‘Thy will be done.’” Elder Carl Cook also articulates this message beautifully, saying, “We are Heavenly Father’s children. He wants to be part of our lives, to bless us, and to help us. He will heal our wounds, dry our tears, and help us along our path to return to His presence. As we look to Him, He will lead us.” This sentiment is further expressed when Elder Cook quotes excerpts from the hymn “The Lord is My Light.” “The Lord is my light; then why should I fear? By day and by night, His presence is near. He is my joy and my song. By day and by night, He leads me along.” Heavenly Father knows what is best for us. He can see the whole picture, and He knows us better than we know ourselves. There is peace and happiness in trusting His guidance, and not leaning upon your own strength.

We always hear that Heavenly Father wants us to be happy. I always thought of this as ‘Heavenly Father wants us to follow His commandments because that will lead us to happiness.’ This is true, but He also wants us to be happy simply for happiness’ sake. Think of Elder Cornish’s talk, when his prayers for a quarter to buy some fried chicken are answered. Earlier in that same talk he quotes Matthew 7:11 “If ye, being evil, know how to give good gifts you’re your children, how much more shall your Father which is in Heaven give good things to them that ask him?” There are people we love unconditionally, and all we want is for them to be happy. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, in their infinite love, are certainly even more capable of this. They want us to be happy because they love us.

The last thing I wanted to talk about was how the scriptures can increase our happiness. Right now, I’m in a scripture study class in Institute, and it has been a huge blessing in my life. Not only am I able to escape the stresses of campus for 2 hours a week, but I have developed a better love and understanding of the word of God. Elder Eyring’s talk on the Book of Mormon promises that “The doctrine and the valiant examples will lift, guide, and embolden you.” Elder Richard G Scott’s talk, The Power of Scripture outlines all the ways the scriptures can bless us, and says, “The Scriptures are like packets of light that illuminate our minds and give place to guidance and inspiration on high. They are pure truth.” He explains that power, companionship, direction, support, revelation, inspiration, and truth are found in the words of the prophets and our Savior.

My favorite line from this talk is “Scriptures can calm an agitated soul, giving peace, hope, and a restoration of confidence in one’s ability to overcome the challenges of life. They have the power to heal emotional challenges when there is faith in the Savior.”

I know this is true. In the darkest, loneliest, most miserable time of my life, I turned to the scriptures. And they healed me. Elder Scott is right- they do have the power to heal you. They healed me, there is no other word for it.

Sometimes, we can be happy simply by just deciding to be happy-it's that easy. But most of the time, it’s more difficult than that. Sometimes it takes sincere, sorrowful repentance. Sometimes we have to sacrifice our own will in order to follow the will of our Father…but it is worth it. We have a promise that if we do our best to work towards it, we will be granted eternal happiness. And that’s just not a promise we get anywhere else.

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It was a little longer than that, I removed some stories that weren't really mine. I felt okay using them there, but not so much in publishing them on the internet.

Later Sunday night, I ended up having to email a professor asking for an extension on a paper. I have never had to do that before. Come hell or high water, all-nighters, insane amounts of Diet Coke, or skipping a class, I have ALWAYS finished papers on time. It really sucked. I can't figure out why this semester has been so hard- it's the fewest credits I've ever taken, and two of them are lower division classes. Somehow it turned in to a pity party, and I was just really, really scared- that I wouldn't be able to handle this semester, that I won't ever figure out what I'm doing after graduation, that I won't ever get married, that I won't figure out an honors thesis, pretty much...everything.

And then I was like, "Oh, remember how you JUST GAVE A TALK ABOUT CASTING OUT FEAR?"

So I read Psalms for 40 minutes and fell asleep.

Moral of the story: Don't be an idiot. And Psalms are awesome.

Clairetober Cont'd: Stress, Wendover, Stress

2011-10-25T19:39:00.001-06:00

Since my last post, Clairetober has been a mixed bag. The week of my birthday was pretty stressful, my actual birthday was pretty fun (cabin with the family and Kendra, then two of my sister's friends.) My favorite present? My mom got me the most perfect bag ever made- the perfect shade of grey, leather, over the shoulder strap, capable of holding my laptop, 2 notebooks, and 4 textbooks. It's my purse soul mate.

The rest of my birthday weekend was pretty stressful, minus the trip to Cafe Sabor. I had so much homework to do, but even though I worked all day Saturday, I still somehow got almost nothing done.

In order to get the free fried birthday ice cream, you must wear a sombrero.

Last week was stress on a platter with a side of dipping stress. I had 4 midterms, a quiz, and 2 papers. I pulled my first legit all-nighter- all previous all-nighters actually involved 2-4 hours of sleep. It was brutal. I wend to the DR on Thursday and was told I have a highly contagious eye infection- yay! I had to throw away my contacts, my contacts case, my bottle of contact solution, and ALL my eye makeup- not allowed to resume contact/makeup wearing practices until next Monday. I have burning fire acid eye drops I must use every 6 hours. It hurt to read or look at the computer for more than 10 minutes at a time. My joy is full.

Then, fall break! Thursday night a couple of my friends came over and we had a casino night to prepare for Wendover. Basically, Gabe, Tori, and Trin taught Kendra and I how to play five card poker, Texas Hold 'em, and Blackjack. Wait... are Blackjack and 21 the same thing? *Googling* Yes, they are. We do not like Blackjack. It is lame.

Somehow we ended up watching Jersey Shore till 3 AM after a McDonalds run. I don't know how this happened, to be honest. Like, Kendra has all of the seasons of Friends on DVD, Jersey Shore should never need to be viewed. Also- I have eaten at McDonalds more this semester than...probably the rest of my life combined. We need an intervention.

The next day we went to Wendover! It was a blast. I am awful at gambling, so just watched everyone else play craps for most of the night- but I had so much fun. In fact, if you don't gamble at all, it is quite a steal. 13 bucks (you pay 18 but they give you 5 back!?) gets you a ride there and back, a $25 seafood buffet, and $5 for slots (which I lost in approximately 5 seconds.)

We left Logan at 3:30 PM Friday and returned around 5:30 AM Saturday. Not for the faint of heart.

Saturday was spent mostly in recovery. I don't think I woke up until 4 PM, then Kendra and I probably didn't leave the downstairs couch for 5 hours. We were so gross feeling we refused to even make a McDonalds run- woah.

I know Taylor suggested that I should keep track of how many free dinners I got for Clairetober. It's actually only been the one dinner at Cafe Sabor... although my dad did take Kendra and I out to eat after we got our flu shots at his clinic. There might be more coming... my grandparents have been out of town, my aunt wants to go out to lunch, my sister promised me sushi, and Gabe (after he won BIG TIME in Wendover) has promised to take me out to eat too. So we'll see. I'll keep you updated, I swear!

GRE & Weekend Update

2011-10-08T21:47:00.000-06:00

Today, my roommate Kendra and I went to take a free practice GRE. I've been kind of freaking out about the GRE- but after this (and deciding that I'm probably going to take a year or two off before I start grad school) I feel a lot better about it.

The test isn't anything that exciting. We sat there for over an hour and a half before we actually got started. At one point, we had a ten minute break... Kendra and I were FREEZING cold and starving... and obsessed with Cafe Ibis' Mexi Hot Chocolate, so we decided to make a run to the QuadSide in the library. We totally would have made it, but the lady in front of us decided to pay for her tuna melt and coffee all in change.

We had to give up on the Mexi Hot Chocolate :(

Anyway, for scores, they just gave us a range for some reason. I guess we'll get more definite scores in a month or two. I don't even know what a good score is, but I think I did alright?

Quantitative: 740-800

Verbal: 560-660

I was looking over some of the answers, and I made a lot of stupid mistakes. I remember in 10th grade, in AP European History, I noticed that I had ended up switching a lot of correct answers to wrong ones in the last few minutes. Teachers and professors always tell you to review your answers, but always ends up hurting me. If its a test in class, I can just finish early and turn it in, but when there are timed sections and you can't move on to the next section... Yeah, so that's what happened on several questions- I had it right, then talked myself into a wrong question when I went back over the questions.

Anyway, today I also went to my first football game of the season. Good news- no last minute, heartbreaking awfulness. We won 63-19 against Wyoming State.

On a completely unrelated note...while I was taking the GRE, my whole family was at my little cousin's baptism! I felt so bad missing it, but everyone told me to take the GRE instead. I'm so proud of Pehrson, though! Wish I could have been there. I'm really sucking at attending family events lately.

FINAL random aside- I just freakin love my roommates. I know a lot of people say that, but I cannot tell you... they seriously are huge blessings in my life, and every single one them is in my life for a reason. There are about a billion times a day I think, "Seriously, how are we so funny?" They make my life so awesome.

Hope you're all having an awesome Clairetober! I know I am. : )

Happy Clairetober!

2011-10-03T15:56:00.000-06:00

That was a such a good weekend.

Friday, I was actually sick and sleep deprived, then had to take a test with half an hour of sleep. Not so fun. After I took the test though, Kendra and I went to Wal-mart where I got some Diet Coke in my system and was cured. We went to print out some pictures- Kendra to send to a missionary, me to finish a 'project' for my room.

"There are only two places in the world where we can live happy: at home, and in Paris" with pictures from my study abroad.

"Edinburgh is a city of shifting lights, of changing skies, of sudden vistas. A city so beautiful, it breaks the heart again and again." with pictures from my internship.

Lindsey and I then headed to home Layton. Her family was driving down from Idaho Falls to go to conference, and for some strange reason, they were staying there Friday night, then SLC Saturday night.

My mom, Lindsey and I then went out to eat, then to see Crazy, Stupid, Love. It is a movie I feel a little conflicted about recommending because there were some pretty inappropriate parts- but I don't think I've laughed so hard in a movie...ever. I didn't even mind that the popcorn was not good- and that is a major thing coming from me. There were two guys sitting behind us, and they were laughing even harder than we were at some parts- not like, snickering at the 'chick flick' laughing, but uncontrollable laughter.

On Saturday, we watched conference, made 72 hour kits, then Sarah and her roommate came home and the girls went shopping and to dinner while Peter went to the priesthood session. My good friend Matt came over after- it was so good to see him. We did have a little spat about politics... "I'm pro-life." "How do you feel about the death penalty?" "We should have an express lane." "...do you even hear yourself?" BUUUT I love him anyway, so we got over it.

Sunday, I woke up way too early and headed to SLC to try and get standby tickets to conference with Danny. My dad ended up driving me and dropping me off because he was convinced I wouldn't find parking anywhere. It was awesome to see Danny again- I haven't seen him since we got back to Edinburgh from Poland. We weren't able to get tickets to either session, but we sat in overflow seating in the tabernacle then the visitors center. Can I just say the sister missionaries are legit at temple square? They came and talked to us three different times, asking if we had any referrals. They are kind of fearless.

Conference was just awesome. I definitely got more out of this conference than I think I ever have. That whole, have-a-specific-question thing really works. One of the main themes I noticed was happiness. Heavenly Father loves us and wants us to be happy- not just because that means that we are keeping His commandments, but also simply because He loves us and wants us to be happy simply for happiness' sake. There were so many moments where things I already knew were just completely reaffirmed to me... and now I know them. Does that make sense? Probably not. Anyway, I can't wait to go back and read them. The only thing I was slightly miffed about... Uh, Elder Holland only spoke in priesthood session? What is up with that?! He's my favorite.

Brady was awesome and offered to drive me home from SLC, which turned out to be a really good thing since my dad got called in to do a surgery. When we pulled up to my house, Peter, Sarah, and her roommate are running around outside with nerf guns. What? This is not a normal occurrence at my house. Anyway, we had dinner, Brady and I played with my genius dog, then he left to go home and I headed back to Logan.

One bad thing- got absolutely no homework done.

Ok, but the BEST thing about this weekend?

It's now CLAIRETOBER. Ohhhhh yeaaaah.

Now, before you think I'm the most narcissistic person on the planet, let's just remember that my dad came up with Clairetober, not me.

Anyway, Clairetober is essentially an almost-month long celebration of my birthday. I think it came from a time I jokingly said that so many people wanted to take me out to eat for my birthday that I had to spread it out over the month. (It is kind of true...) So, October 2nd-October 29th is Clairetober, since I let my grandpa, uncle, and Halloween have their own days. I'm so benevolent.

My dad sent me this to kick off Clairetober:

Not the man with the tongue, the recipe book....for MACARONS! Woo!!

Now I just have to figure out where to find almond flour, vanilla powder, and organic egg whites, among other uncommon sounding ingredients I'm not sure I'll find in the fine metropolis that is Logan, UT.

Peter

2011-09-26T02:36:00.000-06:00

If you read this blog because of the exciting travel adventures I tell, you will probably just want to skip this post.

I believe that we just do not hug enough. I can't remember where I heard this, but I once heard hugs described as 'emotional Heimlich maneuvers.'

I just looked it up- it's from Pushing Daisies...

Charlotte: I can't even hug you? What if you need a hug? A hug can turn your day around.

Ned: I'm not a fan of the hug.

Charlotte: Then you haven't been hugged properly. It's like an emotional Heimlich. Someone puts their arms around you and they give you a squeeze and all your fear and anxiety come shooting out of your mouth in a big wet 'what' and you can breath again.

I just love that.

Anyway, one of the things I miss about my immediate family when I'm not around them much is getting hugged. For some reason, college doesn't really seem to be a super huggy environment, unless you're dating. This is a shame, because hugs, for me, are totally reassuring and comforting and everyone could use them in their lives.

This post is all over the place and not well written. I really should stop blogging at 2 AM. Anyway... My little brother, Peter, is a sweetheart. I just absolutely adore him. Does he drive me up the wall insane at times? Yeah, but I seriously miss the kid so so much.

Between when I got back from Scotland and when I moved up to school was the hardest time in my life. I was absolutely miserable... and not very many things really helped me. Sometimes, friends or family members would be able to pull me out of it for a little while, but sometimes their well meant words just made everything worse. Peter, however... he never did anything but hug me. And he seemed to have a sixth sense about when I needed one. He let me cry on him, would drape his arms around my shoulders as we watched tv. His arms would encircle me when I stood in the kitchen, completely oblivious to what was going on around me. When my eyes would fill with tears at some memory or an insensitive remark, he would pull me to him. Whenever I asked for a hug, he obliged, standing there with his arms around my shoulders until I pulled away.

Peter probably doesn't have any life experience that could have led him to say anything that could have helped me during that time. But he was there for me with a hug, whenever I needed it. It doesn't make a lot of sense for me to feel so protected by my scrawny little 15 year old brother, but I did.

Where is all this coming from? Today was my ward's family day. As I have steadily built my foundation in the gospel- over the past few months, but especially after I returned to Utah and school- I have increasingly seen the Lord's tender mercies in my life. I think I have been increasingly blessed, but I also am more aware of the ways in which I have been blessed all along. I haven't seen my brother since I moved back up to school, and I hadn't realized until I saw him today how much I missed having my very own emotional Heimlich machine at my disposal, and how much those hugs had helped me in the past. He gave me a hug immediately upon seeing me and made some comment about how even in 4 inch heels, I fit just perfectly under his chin (he's now even taller than in that picture below.) It was an emotional Heimlich, and I sure needed it.

Moral of the story? No idea. Go hug your brother. Hug people, in general, more often. Don't blog at 2 AM.

Love you, little brother.

Taken over a year ago- not the most flattering photo of either of us, but I love it.

Gaslight

2011-09-22T02:40:00.000-06:00

http://thecurrentconscience.com/blog/2011/09/12/a-message-to-women-from-a-man-you-are-not-“crazy”/

This is one of the best things I've ever read.

Seriously, go read it.

This is something that really bothers me. I absolutely hate when men act like women are unhinged psychos for expressing emotion.

One of my least favorite things on the planet is when someone tells me to calm down. To me, telling someone to calm down is saying that you believe their emotions are invalid. That you know better than them, you know how they should feel. Telling someone to calm down is telling them that you don't have to listen to or respect them, because they are being irrational- heaven forbid, amirite?

I cannot tell you how much of myself I saw in this article...and it made me sad. And it made me mad.

Women are told all the time that our feelings, our thoughts, are invalid, irrational, and pointless. It happens at work, it happens in relationships, even our parents do it. "Calm down, you're overreacting, don't be so sensitive, don't take everything so personally."

It is NOT irrational to have feelings. You are not oversensitive if you have a reaction to inconsiderate, hurtful, or discriminatory behavior.

This is not a very well thought out or well written blogpost. It's almost 3 am, and I still have to go read forty pages of Plato's Republic. I just came across that article, and it resonated with me.

This line is basically my life.

"No wonder some women are unconsciously passive aggressive when expressing anger, sadness, or frustration. For years, they have been subjected to so much gaslighting that they can no longer express themselves in a way that feels authentic to them."

Poland: Wrap up and photos

2011-09-03T21:11:00.002-06:00

I am a master procrastinator. Have a written a single page for the internship yet? Absolutely not. So, without further ado, here are some pictures from my trip to Krakow.

Main square in Krakow- biggest medieval square in Europe

I just love Krakow. It is way more relaxed and chill than anywhere else in Europe I've been... I loved how the buildings in the main square were painted like this.

There was a guy with a CRAZY amazing falsetto performing here one night. My video of it didn't work at all, so you don't get to experience the magic. Sorry.

Me and the Krakow Dragon. Two seconds later, it started breathing FIRE. No joke.

This is when Danny realized that the dragon was breaking fire, and tried to document it, but was too late...

Vistula River

We crossed this bridge on the way to a museum in the old Schindler Factory. Its a love lock bridge!

They have initials carved in them, and couples lock a padlock here to symbolize their eternal love. Precious. I want to come back and do this.

Krakow Barbican, where we went to the string quartet performance

Wawel Castle Courtyard

Statue of Pope John Paul II. He was the first Polish pope, and the Catholic Church was really influential in the underground anti-communist movement.

Danny and I at one of the statues in the town square.

So, the last time I wrote was Sunday, July 10th. I was chilling in the hostel because my asthma was bad, Danny was out sightseeing. I got to talk to my family on Skype for awhile until Danny came back, then we headed out for the evening.

Danny had gone to a bunch of churches, and showed me some of the ones he particularly liked. I've noticed that a lot of churches, especially if they are in the same area or region, are often very similar. That didn't seem to be the case in Krakow. Each church that I went to had a different layout, different architecture, different decorative styles. I honestly didn't even catch the names of most of them, I have a stack of brochures but they're sitting in my apartment in Edinburgh and I'm in Wales. One thing I did notice is how many people were actually IN the churches. There were quite a few people there for services, or there just to pray when services weren't being held. If you read Danny's blog post I reposted earlier, he talked about this as well.

After we checked out the churches, we got kebabs for dinner- delicious! Way better than the one I had in Scotland. We went back to the main square- easily my favorite part of the city- and kept seeing people with these AMAZING waffle cones of ice cream. Luckily, Danny likes desert as much as I do, so he was totally willing to go in search of the ice cream place. We wandered around for at least 20 minutes before we gave up...because I found a cupcake shop. Before we had even finished our cupcakes, we found the ice cream shop. Before you judge us for getting double scoops of ice cream immediately after eating a cupcake, just remember that I had been eyeing this ice cream for days, and we had been doing nothing but searching for it for half an hour...not to mention that we had tons of Polish zlotys left, and converting it back to pounds sterling would have lost us money. You better believe we BOUGHT. THAT. ICE CREAM...after walking past and finishing our cupcakes and circling back. It's just tacky to eat a cupcake while in line at an ice cream shop, obviously.

We ran into some other Americans while in line, and they were asking if Danny and I were on our honeymoon. I thought this was hilarious, because when I am on my honeymoon, I'm pretty sure I will be showing affection...and Danny and I stand at least a foot apart at all times, and Danny always apologizes when he brushes into me. I guess not that many platonic friends of the opposite sex travel alone together, so it was probably the most logical explanation, but I just thought it was really funny.

Most RANDOM part of the night? We saw a GIANT rubber duck being hoisted above a crowd of people, and they ran it around the square. Whaaaaaat? I tried looking it up on the internet, and could find no explanation.

Our flight was the next day at around noon. We left the hostel and I was, once again, having a really hard time breathing. Danny had been carrying a backpack around with the stuff we both needed for most of the trip, and we'd been able to leave most of the stuff we brought in the hostel. Obviously, we were leaving, so we had to carry all our stuff. I was seriously struggling with my asthma, so Danny made me give him my backpack. The poor guy... he had my backpack on, then had his on front. People were staring at me like I was the laziest person on the planet, and he was some poor whipped sucker. We decided to chill in a park so he didn't have to carry my crap and I didn't have to not breathe. Pastries for breakfast, kebabs for lunch, more ice cream in the mall we passed through to get to our train. We got to the airport with tons of time and zlotys to spare- bought and crammed chocolate and pretzel bread into my backpack. I couldn't breathe for most of the flight home, but I obviously made it back to Edinburgh safe and Danny was relieved of his self-appointed 'keep Claire alive' duty.

Thanks Danny. :)

Seriously, Poland was my favorite trip, I loved it! I would love to go back some day, and would really love to visit other parts of Central/Eastern Europe as well. It seems so much more laid back. Prague, anyone?

Here are some pictures of Auschwitz as well...

Entrance gates to Auschwitz I: Work makes you free. This section was the work camp

Auschwitz Birkenau- the death camp

Rubble from the 'ovens' the Germans destroyed when the abandoned the camp

'To the memory of the men, women and children who fell victim to the Nazi genocide. Here lie their ashes. May their souls rest in peace.'

To tide you over...

2011-07-15T14:23:00.000-06:00

...you should read Danny's blog post on the Poland trip. I'm going to start working on the finishing blog post now, with pictures, but who knows when I'll finally post it. I've been crazy busy and had limited access to the internet the past few days!

Run, Frodo! Poland is confusing, and I am a disaster.

2011-07-10T08:43:00.000-06:00

So, I'm pretty sure I'm just never going to have time to blog about Ireland...until I get back to Utah or something.

Here's a Poland update in the meantime.

Thursday, I got all packed and ready...and had hours to kill. So, I decided to go into Parliament. All I did was go get food and hang out with Mandi. I checked my email, but no one had emailed me anything to do, so I guess its a good thing I didn't end up going in for a full day of work. Met Danny at the bus stop and we set off to the airport. The 35 bus ride is long enough from my apartment, but from Parliament it added almost another half hour- we were still pretty dang early.

Heather, Alisse, and Heather's mom were two gates away from us going to Pisa, so we said hi to them, then just killed time in the airport. Danny bought some book on... a war in Spain... and I started reading Bloodlands by Tim Snyder. Nice light, cheery reading. I didn't get much of it read, because once I got on the plane I was trying to sleep. It kind of worked... although, when you take a nap on the fold out tray table, you wake up with absolutely no feeling in at least one arm. It doesn't really allow you to sleep that long haha.

We got through customs fine, and were encouraged that there was a lot of English....but then we left the airport. Hmm... not so much English. We were fairly certain that we were heading in the right direction, but we did have to pass a foreboding looking forest of death. We were looking for the train station- um... yeah, the train station is actually a shed on the side of the train tracks. Some mosquitos enjoyed eating us for the 20 minutes before the train came. Once it did come, we got on, and saw a ticket machine. We headed over, but then the ticket guy came out. Danny asked if we should buy our tickets from the machine, and the guy responds, "Sit down. Please" in a heavy Polish accent. We were slightly frightened. He came around 20 minutes later once the train left the 'station.'

We got to the Krakow city center terminal... and couldn't get out. Seriously, we couldn't figure out how to get out of there for like, 10 minutes. The station was mostly deserted, and no one spoke any English, and there were no signs in English either. Err... We finally made it out, and using Danny's homemade map we eventually found our way to the hostel. We had to be buzzed into the building... and it kind of reminded me of how a scary movie starts. Not how it actually starts, but when the scary stuff starts. The door creeeeeeaks, slams shut, and we are plunged into absolute darkness. "Uhh....." Seriously, we couldn't see anything. Suddenly, a single lightbulb flicks on over the stairs, so I head over to those. There's a little sign with the hostel's name pointing up the stairs, which are in complete darkness as well. 3 flights later, after Danny telling me to run (I'm pretty sure he was joking...) we made it to the hostel in one piece. The hostel is actually pretty nice, getting in was just an adventure. The bed is actually the best one I've slept on besides one in Ireland that I haven't blogged about yet. We quickly planned out the next day and hit the hay.

Oh, 6 person hostel dorm rooms. At 3 AM, two girls came in to go to bed. I swear they took an hour to get ready to go to bed and were being super loud, but Danny says he barely heard them. Then again, I slept through the 5 AM Ace of Base party. I got up early to talk to Jared, got ready, ate breakfast, and then we headed to the train station to catch a bus to Auschwitz. We stopped on the way because we passed a tempting little bakery- worth it. One lesson I've learned is that bakery stops are almost always worth it, but especially in Poland. Everything is so cheap here. I love the zloty... We thought there was a bus at 9:20, so we made it to the terminal to see that the buses for Auschwitz didn't start until 10:05 so we wandered around the old city. Nothing was really open, but we did walk around a church. It is much hotter here than in Scotland- its been in the low-mid 90's during the day, plus humidity. Bleeeeech.

2 hour bus to Auschwitz. If you aren't going with a prearranged group, you have to go with a tour guide there, just because they have so many people that come and they need to control the traffic.

I don't really know how to explain Auschwitz, so I'm not really going to go into it. What I will say is that it was the most emotionally draining, exhausting, sobering thing I've ever done. After awhile I just had to retreat into my mental happy place and shut my brain off. My mind could not comprehend the situation, how human beings could do this to one another. It was not pleasant at all.

Danny and I got the last seats on the 4:20 bus back to Krakow. I had to go sit in the back by some English guys and he sat by some old Frenchwoman. I felt bad, because I realized that I had the backpack that had all of our stuff in it- so he didn't have his book or iPod or anything. Sorry...but yeah, I took as good of a nap as I was able, and felt a lot better after.

We grabbed dinner in a mall (we were SOOOOO hungry), then wandered around until we stumbled upon the main medieval square. Aaaaand I fell in love with Krakow. There were so many street performers- more than I've seen in the last three months combined in one night. There was a group doing Oasis, Polish pop music, and some song from Sesame Street, then a group of women dressed in traditional clothing singing and playing flutes, an accordion trio, two women playing the violin/viola, and this guy who has the most amazing falsetto I've ever heard. We bought cheap tickets to an outdoor concert at the Krakow Barbican, then wandered around until it was time for the concert. The weather was perfect, Krakow is GORGEOUS. I want to hurry and post this, so I'll add pictures in another post. There was this one church on the corner of the square with birds just flying around, there was a flower market, a nice park... In a word, this area of town is just lovely.

The concert was at 9 PM. It was a quintet- piano, 2 violins, viola, cello...but I think all 5 of them only played for the first and last song. I really enjoyed it a lot- and how often do you get to do something like that? Oh hey, let's go to an outdoor classical music concert at the best preserved barbican in Europe? It was built in the 15th century! Sounds good to me... There were a couple songs Danny didn't particularly enjoy... he said they reminded him of stressful parts in movies, like when Gollum is attacking Frodo, or Harry and Voldemort are fighting... or when we are panicked and running up stairs to our hostel.

Saturday started at Wawel Castle. There were a bunch of different areas you could go see, but you had to buy separate tickets for each of them. We decided on the State rooms and the Dragon's Den. At the state rooms, we kind of joined a tour group because we didn't have any idea what was what. Highlights- the random people singing traditional Polish music in one of the rooms, the cool courtyard, leather walls (!?) nice grounds... my all time favorite, however, was the tapestry room. There was a huge ballroom and every wall had a tapestry- all together, they told the story of Adam and Eve, then Cain and Abel. The tour guide starts at the Adam and Eve end, but I was checking out the ones on the other wall, where Cain kills Abel and is punished. I noticed that his hair was a different color in the last one... turns out, Polish people think that the Mark of Cain is having red hair, so if you're a redhead, you're a descendant of Cain. HAHAHA. Danny and I were cracking up and wishing that Daniel and Mandi were there.

We then went to the Dragon's Den. We were promised that someone would tell us the story of Krakow's Dragon, but no one ever did! I'll just have to look it up on wikipedia. Anyway, it was just a couple underground caves. They were interesting to walk through, plus it was nice and cold down there, a nice break from the muggy heat of the day.

I was starving so we grabbed some pretzels, then we headed over to Schindler's Factory, where they just opened a museum last year on Krakow during Nazi occupation.

Right at noon, all the churches in the city (and there are A LOT of them) starting ringing their bells- it was awesome. You could hear them echoing all over the city. We took kind of a roundabout way to get to the museum...and did I mention that it is hot and muggy here? Because it is.

"Danny... I'm going to whine for just a second."

"Ok."

"Are we theeeere yet?"

"It should be just around the corner...I think."

"Ok."

The museum was really well done, we spent about 3 hours there. I wish that I had been able to read all the information and watch all the little movies. The movie theater room was pretty fantastic- it had the most comfortable chairs ever, it was nice and air conditioned, and we got to rest our feet for half an hour. Towards the end, I was getting a little out of it. I hadn't eaten anything besides a pretzel since 8 AM (we left the museum at 4) and I'd had to go to the bathroom for an hour and a half. Danny was pretty concerned that I was going to murder the obnoxious American tourist that was harassing the Polish museum worker. She was talking really really ridiculously too loud, asking about stupid crap. "Is this desk real? What can you tell me about the type writer? Are these pots old? What year were these pots made?" Ugh. I'm getting irritated all over again.

Once we left the AC safety of the museum my mental state took a turn for the worse. I was pretty delirious- and I felt bad because I could tell Danny was worried I was going to collapse on the street or something, but I was too out of it to really do anything about it. We finally found a place to eat and collapsed into chairs. I had the best pizza of my life... but all the amazingness could be due to the fact that I was just so hungry. Cucumbers, tomatoes, pesto, and ricotta cheese on a normal tomato sauce/mozzarella base. Who knew? I felt about 8,000,000,000 times better after that meal.

We wandered around the Jewish part of the city, found an outdoor exhibition on Polish Jews, Danny bought a suspicious looking peach from a fruit vendor. We kind of ran out of things to do at that point, so we chilled in a park- Danny read while I wrote a postcard, then we went back to the hostel. We met our new dorm mates- A very flamboyant character from the states, James, and three guys from Toronto. We prefer flamboyant male model James to the Toronto guys. Took a shower to get all the nature off of me, and went to bed.

INTERESTING morning on Sunday, to say the least. I didn't sleep very well because my allergy induced asthma has been acting up, and there were drunken people hanging out on the street just outside the hostel for like, 2 hours. I finally got up at 5:30 to go talk to Jared on Skype, but noticed that the guy in the bed across from mine wasn't there... thought that was kind of weird, since I didn't hear any drunk people still in the kitchen or common room.

Headed to the bathroom first, which is on the way to the common room. As I open the door, I hear the following noises from the common room:
*A belt jangling
*A guy saying, "Crap!"
*A girl giggling

Awwwwkward. Guess I'm skyping from the kitchen. I left the bathroom and went through the kitchen and down the hall to grab my laptop from the lockers, and can hear Mr. Smooth telling his special lady that he has to leave to go to Auschwitz at 9 AM. I'm thinking this means they're going to wrap up, but as I headed back into the kitchen to set my stuff up, I heard some noises I DID NOT want to hear, so I hurried and plugged my headphones to talk to Jared. What is wrong with people, honestly? Nasty. I would say 'Get a room!' but we're in a hostel, so the room they would have been in would also have been the room I was in, so never mind.

Got off Skype at 7 AM, but church didn't start until 10 AM and we didn't really have anything to do before hand, so I took a nap till 9, changed, and headed to church. Danny had to stop and fix his shoe, I looked back and saw the missionaries, so we ended up walking with them to church. The branch was so small... 4 missionaries, a couple visiting from AZ, their friend, Danny and I, and 4 members. Everything was translated by one of the missionaries into English, so that was nice... but I'll be honest, I didn't really absorb much of Sunday School or Sacrament meeting. I was having a really hard time breathing- my asthma decided to be like, "MUAAHAH I hate you." I was using most of my focus on forcing air into my lungs, which is kind of exhausting. My inhaler didn't help at all...Breathing isn't supposed to be a conscious thing, and it huuurt. At some point, I was just too tired to keep forcing myself to take full breaths so I took little shallow ones for awhile...but then realized I was shaking and was really dizzy so I figured I needed a little more oxygen in my system. I was trying not to stress Danny out, but apparently I'm not a very good liar when I say, "I'm fine" while wheezing. Really, though, I was kind of panicking. He went to go get a set of the missionaries and they gave me a blessing. I sure do pick convenient times to have asthma attacks, I suppose. Honestly though, I felt better IMMEDIATELY. I still had to focus on breathing, but it didn't hurt anymore and was a lot easier. I am just so unbelievably grateful for the opportunity and ability we have to receive those types of blessings.

Danny wanted to change into some lighter clothes (and I pretty sure he was still concerned I was going to collapse) so we headed back to the hostel. We needed lunch though, so we did stop at a little Polish diner. I got pierogis (awesome) and Danny got some kielbasa. Mmmmm Polish food. It was sooo cheap too, mine amounted to 3 US dollars. I love Poland. I love it! We got ice cream and went back to the hostel.

I'm hanging out here now, just because the air is just too thick for me and I need to take it easy until it cools down and the air is a little easier to breathe. I made Danny go do more sightseeing though, because I would feel so so guilty if he spent any more time babysitting me. I honestly can't figure out why he even wants to be friends with me, I feel ultra high maintenance. The first time we hung out, I was on pain killers and had split my thumb open, and I feel like its been pretty consistent since then. Really though, Danny is an awesome friend, and he does watch out for me. I'm not sure how I can make up for the stress I seem to be causing him, but maybe if I get him on the Mormon Bachelor it'll make up for it. Hahaha...I'm doing it.

Anyway, I'm planning on going out again at 6 or 7, and our flight leaves tomorrow at 2 PM, so we should get some more fun in there somewhere.

Pożegnanie! (According to google translate, that means Goodbye! in Polish.)

All good things...

2011-07-06T05:37:00.002-06:00

Today is my very last day at the Livingston constituency office.

Here's a brief (possibly...) run down of the past few days.

Monday I was here in Livingston. I wrote a few new press releases and re-released a few from last week because they hadn't been picked up and Angela thought that they were particularly important. I think writing press releases has been one of my favorite responsibilities on the internship- Harvest says it gives me the power! I'm not entirely sure what power that is, but it makes me feel important so I'll roll with that.

I got to talk to Jared for awhile as well. I felt bad, I was stealing him from his family...but hopefully they'll forgive me. Right when he got off, I got to talk to my sister! I've been able to talk with my mom and dad fairly often, but its been harder to get ahold of the siblings-they're too cool for me, I guess. It was really nice to talk to her-we're goofballs. I was then able to talk to my mom and we were able to hammer down some details for our London partaaaay. We still don't have a place to stay, but who needs that? *Panicking*

In all that talking, I unfortunately missed FHE. I felt like a loser because Danny was giving the lesson, and had asked for my help in coming up with a topic to teach on. He used the topic I came up with, and I wasn't even there for it! Sorry Danny, I am a bad friend. I'll buy you a pierogi in Poland or something to make it up to you.

On Tuesday I woke up at 5:30 to talk to Jared. Who knew the 7 hour time difference from the UK to Utah would be preferable to something? 5 hour time difference is super inconvenient. Anyway, I think I might be turning into a morning person (although you'd probably say differently if you saw me from 3-5 PM when I hit a major slump.)

Went on my merry way to work. I went into Parliament because our internship coordinator was going to have a little CV (resume) clinic for us, and I like to mix it up and go to Parliament on occasion. I worked in the SNP media room with Paul- who was dressed in a University of Utah hoodie. Scandal. I liked it, but I'm not sure everyone else appreciated it. There was a bit of a mix up- apparently I wasn't clear enough when I explained the situation, so everyone- Angela, Norma, and Annmargaret- thought I wasn't working at all, instead of working in Parliament. I basically just wrote another press release, and released that and another one (I was waiting on a few statistics before sending it out) to the media. I also worked on my London plans... took an actual lunch break (when I'm in Livingston I just bring my lunch and eat at the computer...there's a cafeteria at Parliament...and I eat with other people!) I've missed eating lunch with my intern peeps. We're pretty cool people. Did some more work, which might have included figuring out if it was logistically possible for me to make a pit stop in Ohio before heading home (answer: not even a little bit.)

Once Danny was done we 'planned' our Poland trip. Really what it was was printing off directions from the airport to the hostel and being like, 'Uh, so we'll figure out how to get to Auschwitz once we get there...One day we could just go to all these museums on this map... One day let's go to that city that was designed as the perfect communist town... ok cool." We suck at planning things, but I think it'll be just fine. We left Parliament and I discovered that the bus was being diverted because of a party at Hollyrood Palace. I had a moment of panic, because I've never walked to or from Parliament and my apartment, but Danny was headed to the church to help the missionaries teach a lesson, and my apartment is on the way ish. Once we got going I realized that I totally could have figured it out, so no worries. Danny impulse bought some ice cream, so I did too...best hazelnut ice cream I've ever had. Mmmmm...I'm starting to think it was an excellent choice for me to have a bus pass the last 2 months, otherwise I would've had to walk past all these bakeries and ice cream or fudge shops, and I'm just not strong enough.

I ate dinner (a banana...) and headed over to Daniel and Mandi's apartment. I'm refusing to go grocery shopping again because I'm leaving for Poland tomorrow, and then I'll basically be out of town for much longer than anything I buy will last. (I just realized I have frozen chicken...idiot!) Anyway, so the past few days I've refused to buy lunch meat or cheese or yogurt or anything, so I've been eating my reserves- I finished off everything but the protein shakes, bananas, and digestive biscuits. I had a big lunch at the Parliament cafeteria (its a full meal for £3! What the what? I can't even buy a sandwich out at the Livingston mall for that!) so it was fine. Stop worrying. I take vitamins.

Anyway, Daniel and Mandi's. I finally stole those Ireland pictures, so hopefully I'll be able to blog about that ASAP. We just watched some British TV- the best is this show called 'Take Me Out.' Basically, there is this panel of 30 or so women, and a guy gets sent out to face them. Each woman has a button that controls her lit pedestal. They all start off white, but if they are turned off by him they hit it and their stand goes red. So the guy will come out and based purely on looks, they'll go through round one. Then they show a video of the guy introducing himself, showing a bit of his everyday life, saying what he likes in a woman, whatever. That's round 2. In the third round, randomness occurs. Sometimes a video made by a friend telling embarrassing stories will come on, sometimes the guy will play his guitar and serenade them, he'll read a love poem, whatever. At the end of all three rounds, if there are still any lights on, he's earned a date. At that point, he gets to go narrow it down to 2 girls, then he gets to ask them a question, then he picks the final one. They match about 5-6 people per episode, and you get to see the dates from the previous episode's matches. It is hilarious, and awkward, and probably often humiliating, and we should have a version. You should just go watch it on youtube or something, because I did not do a very good job of articulating the awesomeness. Anyway, we also ate popcorn, and it was delicious.

"Claire, did you bring another bag of popcorn?"

"Yep."

"Are you serious?!! I was totally kidding, but that is AWESOME."

Anyway, we decided (and by we, I mean Daniel) to go to the ceilidh. We met Danny there but all the tickets were sold out, so we went back to their apartment and played Yahtzee! I prefer Fargo (because I SUCK at Yahtzee, basically) but it was still a ton of fun. And yes, we ate my second bag of popcorn and Mandi played the 90's hits Yahoo radio channel. It was super cool.

Went home, went to bed, woke up, talked to Jared ("I think it's funny that you're planning a trip to Disneyland and I'm planning a trip to Auschwitz..." "Happiest place on Earth, most depressing place on Earth.") got ready, ran through the pouring rain to the train station, and am now on my lunch break. It's actually been fairly busy, I've had 4 new cases assigned to me. I've really enjoyed working out here in Livingston. I can't believe that my internship ends tomorrow! I'm going to miss Annmargaret and Norma, they really have been so much fun to work with, and I've learned a lot from them. They are just incredible women!

Up later in the day- we interns have dinner with the Program Director, who is in town...for some reason. Are we the reason? I'm not sure...but he's taking us out to dinner somewhere on the Royal Mile, so that's really all I need to know. I have to go straight there from the train station, and then we all have to go straight from that to Institute. I think they're having a little send off for us, and a BBQ to help us feel better about missing the 4th of July. I'm going to miss the YSA as well! They are great examples of how YSAs should function, the attitudes we should have about YSA activities, and how to come together as a family unit when you're away from home. It's been great, and I hope I'll get to see them again- some of them are planning a Utah visit for General Conference.

Thursday- Half day at Parliament (possibly) then POLAND!

Wow. That was not brief at ALL.

Seth Meyers would be ashamed of this weekend update.

2011-07-04T03:43:00.000-06:00

So, Nadal lost. Boo.

I know, you are all very upset, I can tell.

Anyway, weekend update.

Saturday was originally going to be St. Andrews to see the largest cathedral in Scotland, the university (3rd oldest in the English speaking world) and the castle. St. Andrews is also where golf was invented, if you care about things like golf.

Buuut Danny texted me that morning saying Heather and Alisse were going to Ben Lomond and Loch Lomond and that he wanted to do that instead. My thoughts were basically as follows,

"If I run around in nature today, I will die."

My allergies, after spending 18 hours outside, then after my outing to Arthur's Seat, were not doing so well. No way was I frolicking around a mountain all day. So instead, I went back to bed, made myself a lovely breakfast, took my sweet time getting ready, started some laundry and headed out to go to a museum. On the way, I passed an international food fair, so I bought some paella (Spanish rice dish) and wandered around that for awhile. Then I passed St. Andrew's Square and... oh, cool, it's Polish day. Awfully convenient, as I'm going to Poland on Thursday, right? So I wandered around that for awhile, picked up some brochures and maps etc. Finally made my way to the museum to discover that...it was closed for renovation until November.

Bummer.

Sat in a park and listed out things I want to do when my parents come. It's a loooooong list, I hope we make it through everything! Wandered from New Town into the old city, wandered the Royal Mile and Grassmarket, started reading some Irish mythology.

It was kind of boring. I really hate hanging out by myself in these 'wander the town aimlessly' situations. I went back to the apartment with the intention of making myself dinner and talking to my parents on Skype (THEY STILL HAVEN'T BOUGHT THEIR TICKETS!!! *Update...they have now purchased tickets. Yay!) then running to the ward talent show, but my parents never appeared and I was being sulky so I didn't go. Instead I watched 'Country Strong.' Word of advice- do not watch this movie while in a sulky mood. All you will want is a hug and ice cream after...maybe also Garett Hedlund to shave. Ok, 'Give In To Me' was swoon worthy. Anyway, Averyl came home and we watched MORE crappy music videos, which DID make me feel much better.

Er... then I went to bed?

I woke up to some seagulls screaming, "I'M A BIRD! I'M A BIRD!"

Went to church for the first time in a few weeks because of Malta and Ireland, and was able to go to all three meetings for the first time in a month because I'd been helping Mandi in nursery. It was just good.

After church I took a mini nap, made some food, then headed over to Festival Square- that's where they have the big screen TV, and they were showing the Wimbledon final. It was really cool, it was a fun atmosphere. I only stayed for about an hour and a half, because it was sooooo hot...and Nadal was losing...

Highlight of my day? I got to talk to Jared! TWICE! Our computers were having technical issues, but miraculously healed so we were able to actually hear and see each other. Turns out not only has he been sick and obviously sleep deprived for 3 weeks, he also hyper extended his knee and is on pain meds that "make him loopy." This he tells me as he's about to drive for an hour and a half then get on an airplane. *Shakes head* Anyway, I just hope his month with his family will do less damage than his month with EFY. 3 whole weeks without Skype has been madness, I'm glad that's over!

Anyway, that was my weekend. Not very super cool, I know.

I hope you all had a good Independence Day weekend and have a good actual Independence Day ~~tomorrow~~ today! I don't know what we American interns will be doing... probably just go to FHE? Picnic? Watch Madame Butterfly at Festival Square? I would say the possibilities are endless, but really, there are about 3 possibilities so that's just not true.

Arthur's Seat

2011-07-02T04:01:00.003-06:00

Yesterday was my last Friday on the internship...how crazy is that? I cannot believe that this internship is almost over. I feel like I"m just getting started, in some ways. It was a really good day at work, I wrote up a few more press releases, had a nice end-of-internship chat with the group that sponsors us for our visas, did some casework, etc etc. Normal stuff.

I rushed home because my mom wanted to talk about planning the trip...but they never appeared. I was bummed, because on the way home from work I passed a huge Wimbledon semifinal watching party- there's a big TV screen across from Usher's Hall and BBC had an event there. I wanted to go watch so badly! Sigh. I was a little conflicted as to who I should support- I've loved Rafa forever, he's always been my favorite, even when other little tennis playing girls were charmed by Andy Roddick and Roger Federer. Yes, he wears capris, and yes, sometimes he gets wedgies in matches and has no qualms about picking them despite being on TV, and ok, he looks a little bit like a cave man... but HE ROCKS. I haven't watched tennis in awhile, but I love watching him on the clay courts, and the Wimbledon 2008 final? That was tennis at its finest. I almost want to watch it again... BUT Andy Murray was playing him, and Andy is beloved of the people of Scotland. I work for the nationalist party. I was told I was not allowed to be a Nadal fan yesterday.

Well, it's not yesterday anymore, so I am officially back in my Nadal fanhood. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, random tennis fangirl tangent over.

After waiting around for my family to appear, I ate dinner with Heather, Alisse, and Averyl (Heather's friend from BYU who is living in London, came to visit...) Then Averyl and I went to go hike Arthur's Seat with Danny. It was so nice outside! Just a 20 or so minute walk, not really hard... but you know, I haven't seen a treadmill since April and my allergies were killer. The view was AMAZING. So pretty. My camera took kind of crappy photos, but you know me, I'll post them anyway... Also, do you like that I didn't change out of my JCrew button up? Yeah, I'm good at this whole "nature" thing.

The way down was pretty entertaining. Averyl and I were laughing our heads off for various reasons... like, how we kept slipping and falling because the paths are coated with very slippery gravel. Or the ridiculous book Heather and Alisse bought at a thrift store called Unicorn Mountain...and how a book they expected to be whimsical and about unicorns and rainbows and happiness is really about some guy dying of AIDS. We were also laughing about the horrible music videos we watched the other day. Please go watch Butterflies. You will just weep with the deep and poignant nature of this teen romance. Highlights- not understanding the angsty tone of the song, seeing as the guy she's singing to is totally into her and ignores all advances of the popular girl, the time the black rapper pops out of the whiteboard to break it down for us, and the approving looks from the teacher and peers when she starts serenading her crush in the middle of Trig. Priceless. Trizzy66 and Ark Music...what have you done to this world? It isn't as good as the "My Jeans" one, but I don't know if you guys are ready for that yet. We'll work up to it.

Anyway, that was yesterday! Not sure what's going on today, my plans fell through, so... scamper around Edinburgh, I suppose!

Inverclyde: Exit poll-looza

2011-07-01T06:54:00.000-06:00

I will not lie to you- I just gave myself a pat on the back for coming up with that stunner of a title.

Yesterday began at the lovely hour of 5 AM. Since we live pretty close to where the bus heads out of town, we actually got to meet the intern bus a few streets away from the apartment, instead of going into Parliament- so I got to sleep in! :)

I was planning on napping for the 1.5-2 hour drive to Inverclyde, but after about 2 minutes I knew that wasn't happening. Instead, I chatted with the intern sitting next to me. Turns out, we aren't the only American interns! There is a group of 8 interns that just started this week. I feel bad for them, honestly. Not only does everyone constantly ask them if they are the next set of BYU interns (must be tough, living in our shadow...) but they've also been here for a month taking classes learning how to research, instead of working with their MSPs! So now, they only have a week and a half of working with them before the summer recess, and they leave at the end of July.

Anway, we arrive at Inverclyde, are put into pairs, and dropped off at various polling locations to do an exit poll. Danny got stuck with me and we were dropped off at a little out of the way polling location. The sun was shining, it was a gorgeous day. It was pretty simple. People would walk out of the polling location and we would ask them if they would tell us who they voted for. By the end of the day we had a pretty effective script down.

"Hi, we're doing a quick exit poll for the Scottish Centre for Economic and Social Research. For research purposes, we're wondering if people would mind telling us who they voted for this morning/afternoon/evening."

Bam. A lot of people actually didn't want to answer us. The secret ballot is a bid deal here- people were telling other interns about Scots fighting and dying for the right to have a secret ballot. Some people actually thought what we were doing was illegal- at our first location, someone was shouting that Danny and I should be arrested, that what we were doing was outrageous, illegal, and shameful. As this guy is storming off, Danny just calls after him, "Have a good day...!" Hahaha. Oh, Danny, he's just so unfailingly nice.

Here's the day's schedule

6:20-8:00 Drive to Inverclyde

8:00-11:30ish 1st Exit Poll Location

11:30-12:45 Lunch Break

1:00ish-4:30ish 2nd Location

4:30ish-5:30ish Dinner Break

5:30-8:45 ish 3rd Location

8:45-9:45 Pub Break

9:45-11:20 Drive to Edinburgh

Look at all those hours Danny had to put up with me! Actually, we had a grand old time. Most of the time was spent waiting for people to come out of the polling location, so we enjoyed the beautiful weather and came up with ways to occupy the time.

"If you were a mineral...what mineral would you be, and why?"

We just made it fun, I guess. I'm really glad we were put together because all the other interns had the worst attitudes yesterday. I was almost embarrassed to be associated with them, honestly. (Probably a little too much honesty for the internet...) Everyone whining about how early we had to go, how late we were going to be there, how useless polling was, how cold it was, how boring it was, blah blah blah. It seems a little hypocrital to whine about how much everyone was whining, so I'll stop, but man...it was aggrivating.

On the breaks, we'd get picked up by the intern van/bus and then taken back to this warehouse... for lunch I went with a few of the new interns to McDonalds because all I wanted in the whole wide world was hot chocolate. Then we came back and grazed on the table of treats set up in the corner, then I sat around and talked to all the new interns.

Our second location had a really pretty garden, and the building they were using was also a museum. We thought about running in to check it out, but I think we forgot. There were a lot more people out and about in that area, so it was fun to just people watch. People from the political parties kept trying to see our data though, so we kept having to move to evade them...and we some some LDS missionaries! How random.

For dinner Paul bought us pizza and we all ate it on the waterfront...again, went back to the warehouse and sat on the ground for awhile... I busted out the cards and Danny and I played War. It was a fierce competition, but we each won a game.

"Claire, if you were a playing card, which one would you be?"

"Uh.....Queen of Spades."

"You like to ruin everyone's lives?"

"Uhhhh you need me to shoot the moon! Then you get ALL the points! What would you be?"

"Jack of diamonds."

"Oh...so you're worthless?"

"I'm worth 10 points!"

"Only in the special version."

"Are you calling me special?"

"Yes."

I'm so mean. Let's just remember that he also routinely makes fun of me for slicing my thumb open and has given me the nickname Blairf, not to mention that sometimes he threatens to make me sleep in a park in Poland.

Our last location was a primary school in a suburb. Everyone was so nice to us...with the possible exception of a candidate that was trying to bribe me with a Scottish flag to let him look at my polling numbers. Get your own!

Once we were done we went back to the warehouse to wait for another bus to head back to Edinburgh. It was kind of exciting to see everyone bustling about. I think we're invested as much as we can be in Scottish politics, but it's obviously nothing on what these people feel. It reminded me of my experience on the Corroon campaign- just all those weird emotions on election day, the bonds you make with people. I thought I would never do a campaign again after how stressful the Corroon campaign often was, but I kind of have the bug again. Who knows?

The bus ride home had a gorgeous view of the coast. It was late, around 10 PM, but the sun still hadn't set when we were in that area. It did eventually get dark, so then I read and listened to my iPod. Got home at about 11:30, heated up some soup, and went to bed. I love nice long productive days.

Anyway, I had seriously such a fun day, it was a great experience. I was grateful to be put to work in whatever capacity they needed me in, and it really showed me how different an experience can be based on your attitude. I can't believe my internship is over less than a week, and that I'm leaving Scotland in less than a month! Time has FLOWN by.

This really has been such a fantastic couple of weeks within the larger amazing experience and opportunity that has been this internship in Scotland. I think I've grown, developed, and changed for the better more in these past few months (including the last bit of Spring semester) than I have in quite some time, and I'm grateful for everything that has been a contributing factor to that.

Life is good.

Updates- I'm sorry I'm so longwinded.

2011-06-29T07:02:00.001-06:00

I know you are all on the edge of your seats, anxiously waiting for me to post about my trip to Ireland. I have bits and pieces written up, but the majority of the post is guided by the photos I have! I took a lot of pictures, but a lot of photos are also on Mandi's camera. I'm waiting to steal them from her before I write about Ireland. Unfortunately (for me at least, not for her!) she and Daniel have fled the country for a sunny vacation in Spain! I didn't get a chance to snag them before they left, so I'll just wait until they get back before I post about the trip.

Until then, I'll just post about life post-Ireland. :)

Also, I just reread this post, and it pretty much sounds like I'm on drugs I'm so happy. I promise that is not the case. No drugs.

Monday, we got back into Edinburgh around 9 AM. I called Norma to see if I should go out to Livingston (where I don't have a computer Monday and Friday) or into Parliament (where I do have a computer, but all my work is in Livingston). She told me that I wouldn't have a computer, but that I should still come on in. I told her that I still needed to shower and everything, so I'd be much later than normal...was she SURE she didn't just want me to go to Parliament? Yes.

I started a load of laundry (after two trips, I was literally down to my last clean pair of socks and underwear) and took a shower. As soon as I got out of the shower though, I didn't feel very well at all. It might have had something to do with the crappy food they have in Dublin, or no sleep, or who knows what else. Finally, I just decided that it didn't make sense for me to travel clear out to Livingston, where I wouldn't really be able to do any work. I just called and asked Norma if she could forward whatever she wanted me to work on to my aggiemail email account (remember how I can access my work email from anything besides a work computer?) and I'd work from home. Problems solved. I didn't have to get ready, take an hour pilgrimage out to Livingston (not to mention the trip back) and I had a computer... and I could do laundry and write press releases in my pajamas. Nice.

So yeah, that was my day. I also watched a movie (MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL!) on Skype with Brady, talked to Harvest, emailed Klorisa, and talked to my mom on Skype! I was highly efficient. Working from home is kind of awesome.

Oh, crazy story (my mom filled me in). My dad was driving my car through Logan Canyon to go back to work from the cabin, and HE HIT A MOOSE. A freakin moose, guys. He's ok, just a little sore. He was worried the car was going to be totalled, but I think it's going to be ok, just a little pricey. Apparently my car will look brand new, so...that's cool, I suppose. A moose. Scary. I'm glad it worked out ok. I wonder what happened to the moose, though...no one mentioned it. Probably didn't even notice.

Anyway, Heather and Alisse got home from a long day of canvassing in Inverclyde (there is a by election because a MP died, so they are filling his seat...and interns = free slave labor, unless you work in Livingston and no one knows you exist. Suckerrrrs) and Danny was with them...I think he ate a piece of bread and then they left for FHE. Not really sure what that was about, to be honest.

"Danny, want to come over? You can have a piece of bread!"

"Ok!"

They also left about a half an hour early for FHE. I think they were a little dazed from being trapped in a car with someone playing the bagpipes for an hour. I sure would be.

I wasn't planning on going to FHE because I was in a weird mood...just didn't really feel like going. I thought talking to one of my friends would help, but she ended up making me feel worse (thanks, you jerk! haha, I'm just kidding, but you fail at cheering up sugarcoating.) Anyway, I finally just decided... you know what, I should probably go to FHE BECAUSE I'm in need of some cheering up. I don't know why that hasn't really occured to me before, but go I did! And I'm so glad I did, because it was literally exactly what I needed. Ben gave a great lesson (Look, Ben, I worked you in!) that honestly was so perfect for what I needed, it was like it was tailored for me. It was also good to just hang out with Danny and Sarah and the other YSA kids before, poke fun at the 'question game' Sister Connelly makes us play at every YSA event, eat cookies and laugh at Ben's theories on appropriate age differences in relationships, and talk to the Connellys about my internship. I walked home and weather was perfect*. It was a great evening :)

*Perfect now means overcast and cool, breezy, with no rain. I love it.

Tuesday was a PERFECT day at work. Bliss. I finally figured out how to get to Haymarket Station, so if I leave at the same time (8:45) as I normally would for the 9:26 Waverly train to Livingston South, I can make the 9:01 Haymarket EXPRESS train to Livingston South, so I get in almost a whole hour earlier. You know when you catch a bus or train at the perfect time, so you're not sitting around waiting forever, but you also aren't running to catch it? It's just so satisfying. Got to work, wrote three press releases, Angela approved them all and I sent them out to press. Finished uploading casework letters to the casework management system. Caught up on all my emails, worked on a few of my cases, and closed a few others. I just felt so productive and efficient. There was an hour or so where I was waiting for IT to fix a security clearance issue on my computer, so I ate lunch and talked to my mom, aunt, and friend Matt on facebook. Turns out my family can trace our ancestry back to the Mayflower, which is cool, but we're also distantly related to George W. Bush, which is NOT so cool. Also exciting- I got my iPod back! I accidentally left it at work the day before I left for Ireland, and missed it dreadfully.

Got back to Edinburgh, ran some errands (all I had in the fridge was lunch meat and expired eggs) and made dinner. I ate with Alisse and a friend of Heather's who is visiting from London. Alisse didn't even know she was coming until the day before, I had no idea until I saw her... and Heather was in Inverclyde again, so we entertained her. Actually, you could say she entertained us...after dinner we just watched horrible music videos a la Rebecca Black. My Jeans? Butterflies? My Reflection? Ordinary Popstar? I Don't Want To Be a Crappy Housewife? You should look them up. It was great fun.

Alisse was really happy that we were going to be able to run the dishwasher because she bought dishwashing capsules. It hasn't been run since before we left for Malta, and we really wanted clean dishes... but then she discovered that she hadn't actually purchased dishwashing capsules...they were laundry detergent capsules. And she bought them...the same time she just stocked up on laundry detergent. HAHA. So I took a walk- it was gorgeous outside- and bought some actual dishwashing soap.

Today I woke up to a clear blue sky and sunshine! By the time I left for work, it was overcast just the way I like it. Caught the early train again, and have just been at work. I had to research a local development trust group and prepare a brief for Angela, so that was a change of pace. Tonight I have Insititute (with free dinner, always a plus) then I have to get to bed early. Why?

Remember how, a few paragraphs up, I mercilessly told you about how all the other interns have had to go to Inverclyde to canvass? Tomorrow is the election, and Paul called me up and asked me to come.

"Hey Claire, it's Paul."

"Hey, how are you?"

"Good....so... you know how the other interns have been going to Inverclyde? Can you come along tomorrow for the election?"

"I'll have to ask Angela, but I should be able to, I suppose."

"I already spoke to her. Are you a morning person?"

Instant dread.

"Well, I can be if you need me to be, Paul."

"You are my favorite intern. We're meeting at Parliament at 6 AM"

"Do I at least get a free breakfast out of this?"

"Nothing is open that early for us to buy you guys breakfast. McDonald's I suppose...I can just bring a jug of coffee."

"I don't drink coffee Paul. None of us do."

"I heard you did drink coffee!"

"From who!?"

"Scott."

"Paul, I don't even know who Scott is."

"The guy who's been driving the bus to Inverclyde!"

"Paul...I haven't gone to Inverclyde once."

"Must've been someone else..."

This is what I get for being so gleeful that I never had to go. Oh well, it's just one day, and some people like doing exit polling, so I'll just have to learn their secrets. I just want to know who's been spreading rumors that I drink coffee! Haha.

Alright, Norma and I are off to raid the Cadbury Roses stash for a end-of-lunch treat. Back to work!

June 21st and 22nd

2011-06-27T15:46:00.001-06:00

After I got home from the airport, I had about 45 minutes before I had to leave to go to Alan and Alyson's house. Alan is our internship coordinator- his wife, Alyson, was actually an intern from the University of Utah. How cool is that? They invited me and the Baird's over for pizza! I really appreciated it, and had a lot of fun. Everyone else was together at Parliament, but I had to get a bus over to their part of town and then they picked me up. It was raining SO hard, my pants were drenched and my shirt got wet through the zipper of my raincoat. Ridiculous.

We had some Papa John's pizza, then played some games! Mandi, Alyson and I played Speed Scrabble (or Bananagrams) while the boys played FIFA (is that the name? FIFA? that ~~stupid~~ soccer video game?). Then they busted out the KINECT and we played that dance center game. I'm not going to lie, I was not excited about this. I cannot dance at all. Seriously. Sarah got all the rhythm in the family. I can barely spell rhythm. When DDR came out, it was a dark time for me, because I looked a fool whenever we played. Anyway, we went straight in to dance battles. I made everyone else go first, because I am not into public humiliation.

I should not have been worried.

Everyone is just as "white" as I am. I should've known! It was an absolute BLAST, I had so much fun. We all looked like absolute idiots, but that was the fun of it! We played another game as well, it was like an obstacle course. The kinect is actually really cool, I like it better than the Wii.

Daniel, Mandi, and I left to go to an event the MSPs had been invited to- we got to take their invites. I hadn't heard a lot about it, but Mandi told me it was like a spa night, and that there would be massages. We get there and it turns out it was a spiritual healing clinic thing. HAHA. It was hilarious...but not because it was supposed to be. Danny was there as well. The three of us got there in time to only do 2 of the stations- we all did massages (obviously) and spiritual prophetic drawings.

At the drawing station, you would go sit down, and someone would dry a picture and...tell your future? Some of them were pretty decent artists... but not the lady I sat with!

"What's your name?"

"Claire."

"Ok, Claire. This is how I do this process. I'm going to ask you to close your eyes, and I'll close mine too. We'll sit here for a moment until I see a picture. I'll draw the picture, then I'll explain it to you. Ok? Close your eyes when you're ready."

I closed my eyes and sat there until she told me she was ready. She drew this really simple drawing of a certificate with a stamp on it.

"Ok, Claire. This is really interesting. I've never seen anything like this before! I saw a certificate of fulfillment. This stamp on it? That's Jesus's stamp of approval. The plan you've fulfilled isn't his plan- its your plan. You've completed your goals and plans, and Jesus approves, and now you can work on fulfilling His plan. Have you accomplished anything lately?"

I'm not really sure how I've fulfilled anything lately, unless my plan was to make it to age 20 or something... Anyway, it was a nice sentiment, a reminder to focus on Heavenly Father's plans and guidance, so I just took that away from the experience. That was a big theme of the event- follow God's plan for you! The massage was nice. The people at the event were genuinely nice people, you could tell they just wanted everyone to be happy...Danny really wished he had pass along cards. :)

My FAVORITE part of the night was hearing about everyone else's experiences. Here's Mandi's, copied from her blog. SO funny.

The free massage was part of an event that our MSP's were invited to so we also got to go. We went, got our free massages, participated in something called "prophetic drawing" and apparently I was blessed and baptized a born again Christian through prayer (how that happened and without my consent is beyond me... haha but this woman kept telling me (after she prayed for me--this all happened while I was waiting in line for my prophetic drawing), "Today is the best day of your life! You've accepted Jesus into your soul and you are born again! It's okay that youwere Mormon... you didn't know any better") <--- what!? haha I was so confused.

Anyway... onto prophetic drawing. I sat down in a chair across from an Irishman named Michael. We exchanged hello's and then he explained to me how the whole thing worked.

Michael: "I'm going to close my eyes. If you see my lips moving, don't be alarmed, I'm praying. When the vision/revelation comes to me I will open my eyes and begin to draw. Okay?"

Me: (Nod)

Michael: (eyes closed... looking very relaxed. VISION HITS HIM! EYES SPRING OPEN) "Wow. that's interesting. I've never drawn this before. Alright , let's have a go".

Me: (Nod and smile).

Michael: (begins to draw... after one line, he rips the page out of his notebook and throws it behind him out of frustration.)

Crazy lady next to him: "Temper Temper"

This woman then proceeds to talk about WWF(why?!), beating people up, and television while lauging hysterically at everything she says--Very spiritual and uplifting. Meanwhile, there is another woman singing (quite beautifully actually) mystical sounds in the background)

Michael: (after responding to the taunts of the crazy woman... gets another piece of paper out and begins to draw... a tree <--he's never drawn one of those before?!).

He spents about 15 mins drawing this "detailed" tree with no leaves.

Michael: "Sorry this is taking me so long. I could spend hours on this drawing. There is so much to it! But sometimes, the length of the prophesy is revealed by how long it takes to draw."

FINALLY, he flips the drawing to face me and says...

Michael: "What do you see?"

Me: "A tree"

Michael: "That's what I thought at first too, but then it became clear to me!"

He flips the drawing around so that the tree now looks like its underground... roots... profound. He begins to point to the area above ground and tell me that that is what I need to focus on. He then grabs a green pen and draws a single stem. He tops that stem with a red rose.

The prophecy is almost complete.

Michael: "You are the rose."

He then explained to me that I was the rose and the roots are symbolic of my Rich Celtic Christian heritage drawn from generations of prayers. Furthermore, he told me that I will see the fruits of their labors because of their faithfulness and prayers in my life and others. Cool.

Daniel had a picture of him and a fire truck, but instead of water coming out of the hose, it was more fire. He was VERY excited about it, because, "I bring the PASSION, baby! I bring the LEADERSHIP!" Or, as Mandi put it,

He doesn't bring water to the fire... he brings more fire! Apparently, he's a very passionate individual and he brings passion to whatever he does, hence the fire coming out of the hose.

I don't know either....

Daniel thought my picture was really funny. "You got a Jesus stamp!" Danny didn't get a prophetic picture drawn, but he did get his personality read...or something. Apparently he's been searching for something, he's been confused since a young boy and someone named Gavin is going to be really important to him. We think they're trying to tell him he's gay.

Mandi, Daniel and I might start a fake Facebook page for someone named Gavin. Just saying.

Anyway, such a funny night.

Wednesday I went in to work in Livingston. I was kept busy catching up on emails and passing along press releases I'd written, and then completing some filing. I came home, ate some dinner, then went to Daniel and Mandi's to plan our trip to IRELAND!!

I got about 2 hours of sleep, then met them at the airport the next morning!

That's what I have to catch up on now...I'll get there, eventually.

Too...fat to be taken?

2011-06-27T04:51:00.001-06:00

We decided that we were going to try and be too fat to be taken as well. Fat people are harder to kidnap, because they are heavier to carry, you know? Anyway, this process involved lots of pizza and gelato.

So, Friday. (June 17)

We went to Valetta, the capital. We didn't really have a definite plan, other than to visit St. John's Cathedral. It was pretty cool- Malta is 98% Roman Catholic, and Catholicism plays a huge role in Malta's history. The island belonged to the Knights of St. John for a long time, so the cathedral was really ornate because they were so wealthy. The pictures make it look a little crazy, but it was really cool. There were also two Caravaggio painting there, which was amazing. I think one of them, considered his masterpiece, is the only painting he did that he actually signed. Coooool! Other than that, we wandered around the city for awhile, bought some fresh fruit, visited a WWII memorial, almost melted into a giant puddle of human jello, ate some pizza. You know, the usual...?

View from the WWII Memorial

Back entrance to St. John's Cathedral

Some random cool garden we killed some time in. We needed to sit in the shade for awhile.

A shot of St. John's Cathedral

Triton Fountain. I promise my outfit was actually cute-ish, ok? I take bad pictures!

We went back to Bougibba, took a little nap, then went in search of a beach. We were planning on taking a bus, but couldn't figure out how late they ran, so we ended up deciding to search for a better beach in Bougibba. That didn't work out so well, so finally we just went to a crappy little beach that had lots of cigarettes mixed in with the sand. It wasn't super hot anymore, because it was in the evening, which was almost better. I just don't handle heat very well... I'm a delicate flower! Haha. We watched the sunset, and then had double scoops of gelato for dinner. We ate it while watching the local bocci tournament. Legit.

On Saturday, we got a free breakfast at the hotel. It was spectacular. The plan was originally to spend the day in Gozo, another Maltese island. Unfortunately, I was feeling really sick, so I decided to stay in Bougibba and be lazy on the beach and by the hotel pool...and make myself feel better by eating gelato. It was a nice vacation day, just getting some sun, reading, napping...and feeling like crap. :) Heather and Alisse were planning on just finding a really nice sandy beach and hanging out there, but they ended up going to Mdina, a really cool town where cars aren't allowed, and you just wander this quaint little village. They also went on a harbor cruise, which I really wanted to do! It looked like a lot of fun.

I thought they would be back for dinner, but they weren't so I headed off to go have a seaside dinner in Bougibba. I got a really cheap spaghetti with rabbit sauce entrée that tasted like hydrogenated corn oil or something, but the view was gorgeous! Seaside dinner-win.

Sunday was also pretty laid back and relaxed. We were planning on trying to find the local branch and go to church, but Malta has this thing where they don't like posting the names of streets, and addresses just consist of street names, no house numbers. All we had was a street name in Mosta for the local branch- no phone number, no directions, no meeting time, nothing. Its once of Malta's larger cities too, and we just couldn't figure out which bus stop we would have had to get off on... So we decided that it probably wasn't the best idea for us to try and wander the streets of Mosta with no clue.

We had free breakfast again at the hotel, then headed off to Golden Bay, which is apparently the nicest beach in Malta. It was pretty great. We spent almost the whole day there- my back and the back of my legs were somehow FRIED, but my face was barely tanned and my arms look exactly the same. Sigh. I got back to the hotel, took an ice cold shower, and just laid on top of my bed on my towel. I got to talk to my dad for Father's Day!

Had a nice dinner, took a long walk along the coastline and watched the sunset. It was almost weird to see the sun set! That never happens in Edinburgh! Plus, places were open after 5! Malta, how crazy. :)

Monday June 20th

Monday we went to Gozo! It sounded just oh-so-exciting, but it didn't really live up to my expectations of delightful fun. The main reason for this, I think, was a combination of no food, no gelato, no water, and lots of sun. As it was our last day, Alisse and I just wanted gelato all day, but there was NO gelato on Gozo.
Anyway, we took a bus to the ferry terminal, then took a ferry to Gozo.

Ferry ride. Rockin the 'I braided my hair last night after I got out of the shower for the 3rd time' look.

We got right on a hop on/hop off bus tour of Gozo. Basically, you're just going to see a lot of pictures with really pretty blue skies. :) I am unable to control myself when it comes to posting gorgeous pictures of basically the exact same shot, I'm sorry.

I for REALZ wanted to go to that beach. Look at it! It's amazing!

These are all pictures of the view from Calypso's cave. Who knew Calypso was here on Gozo the whole time?
Update- Apparently EVERYONE knew. It's right on Wikipedia.

When Alisse took this picture, I thought it would contain the ocean, but it was not meant to be. Just picture it, ok?

This was taken at the Megalithic Temples of Malta, which are the WORLD'S OLDEST FREESTANDING STRUCTURES! Also..the WORLD'S OLDEST RELIGIOUS STRUCTURES! OLDEST! IN THE WHOLE WORLD!

Heather is trying to catch a lizard.

I mean, they don't look that cool, but seriously. OLDEST. IN THE WORLD.

Walled city in Gozo. This is where I hit a wall of flames and heat and death and wanted to die of heat exhaustion and dehydration. I'm pretty sure we were all a little loopy from sun exposure.

Ok, the formatting has gone weird and I don't have the desire to fix it, so sorry if it is irritating. The Malta Megalithic Temples had the potential to be super cool, but most of it was under conservation so we couldn't see most of it. Calypso's cave was really pretty- stuff like that is a reason I love Europe, there is so much history, so many legends! I guess you could probably find really cool stuff in North America too, I've just always been drawn to Europe I suppose. Anyway... we learned about Gozo tomatoes. Apparently they keep you from being sunburned, which just means that I don't eat enough of them, I guess. After the tours stopped running at 5 ish, we got back on the ferry and headed back to Malta. I grabbed some gelato, went back to the hotel room, showered, took a nap, then we went and had a seaside dinner till late. Then we got MORE gelato, and ate it on the coast. It was wonderful! We seriously contemplated skinny dipping, but couldn't really work out the logistics. All of the beaches were REALLY well lit in view of most of Bougibba. Oh well...

Got back to the hotel, packed, and headed out the next day, back to Edinburgh! The arrival weather was PERFECT... It was POURING rain. Welcome home! I loved it though, seriously.

So yes, that's the Malta trip! I'm still behind, so expect a flood of posts.

Too ugly to be taken.

2011-06-23T16:33:00.001-06:00

It became a joke, regarding my trip to Malta with Heather and Alisse, that we were going to be taken à la the movie...Taken. We were pretty sure that Liam Neeson wouldn't be able to save us, but our friend Ben Ferguson said he would do his best to step in. He warned us, however, that we would probably fail miserably. Eventually, half the guys at YSA decided that, with their combined skills, they would have a small chance of saving us. In order to help them out, we decided we would just look as ugly as possible so no one would WANT to take us. Smart, right? So yes, "Too ugly to be taken!" was our mantra for the trip.

Malta is gorgeous. It is a small archipelago near Sicily and Tunisia (flashbacks of semester long paper on the strategic culture of Tunisia) in the Mediterranean Sea. It also happens to be much warmer and sunnier than Scotland. Crazy, right?

I woke up before the crack of dawn Thursday morning...which is hard to do, because the sun only sets for about 45 minutes every 24 hours. At 4 AM we headed out the door to catch the night bus- we were leaving so early that regular bus hours hadn't started yet. Unfortunately, we didn't know that night buses cost extra on top of the Ride-a-card passes we have... and none of us had any change smaller than 20 pounds. So...scratch that plan. Surprisingly, there weren't a lot of taxi's driving around at 4 AM either, but I had a number for a cab company in my phone...

'City Cabs.'

'Hello, I need a taxi to Morrison Crescent?'

'Where on Morrison Crescent?'

'Right by the new Springville Centre...'

'I have to have a house address in order to send a taxi.'

'Uhhh... I'll call you back.'

There weren't really any houses nearby, and we were on a street that faced the backs of buildings, so there just weren't address to be seen. I was about to call back and send the cab to our apartment and we'd just walk back and meet it, but right then a taxi came by. Crisis averted. Happy Birthday, Alisse!

We flew on Ryanair, which is a budget airline. They make up for it by itemizing everything and charging for everything. Example- it costs 40 euros to have a carryon bag and a purse/laptop bag, or to print off your boarding pass. We like to joke that if the emergency air masks came down, they'd make you pay 20 euro with a 10 euro credit card processing fee to get oxygen to flow through it. They also try and sell you stuff during the whole flight- lottery cards, phone cards, suitcases, whatever. It's a little nuts, but honestly... cheap flights? Try and sell me whatever you want!

We arrived at the Valetta airport and took an hour bus ride into the city centre, then another hour bus ride to Bougibba, where our hotel was at. Apparently the 70's buses are an icon of Malta (I never really knew enough about Malta to know of its icons, I suppose) AND they are being phased out starting in July for more environmentally friendly models, so I made it just in the knick of time! Phew!

Either it was super windy when Alisse took this picture, or my hair has been possessed. I'll let you decide.

At this point, it was the hottest part of the day, and we arrived in the middle of Bougibba with nothing other than a street name for the address of our hotel. We eventually found it, but man... it was HOT HOT HOT. I'm so used to Edinburgh/Scottish weather, I thought I was going to die. DIE. We had to wait about an hour for our room, and we had no energy to do anything other than sit in the hotel lobby and wilt.

Anyway, got our hotel room, changed into swimming suits, and headed off to the beach!

We just laid there for awhile, then decided to search for gelato. We got distracted... by THIS!

Scamper around the coastline? Play in tide pools? Don't mind if I do...

Yes, I need a tan. I know, I know.

Wow. I'm so, so white, and really good at posing in a flattering manner.

Preeeeeeetty.

But don't you worry, we found that gelato.

Sunset gelato walks. I'm a lucky, lucky girl.

We were all SUPER tired that night (3 hours of sleep say whaaa?) so we passed out around 9 PM.

I was going to do all of Malta in one blog post... buuuut I'm really tired and that would be really long, so I'll just end this here! I'll do the rest as soon as possible, promise! :)

I have a pretty cool life.

2011-06-14T13:24:00.001-06:00

Yesterday, I fell in love.

With Scotland.

Again.

I won't lie to you, my day started off pretty horribly. I was already in a sulky mood because on Sunday, Jared and I talked for what will be the last time in 3 weeks on Skype. He's doing on campus EFY sessions, so he's only going to be able to talk on weekends. Coincidentally, the next two weekends, I'm going to Malta and Ireland. Obviously, that is awesome and crazy cool and I am SO SO excited, but... I can't talk to Jared. So yeah, I was pre-pouting.

Anyway, I had heard from Paul that instead of taking the 30 minute bus ride to Waverley Train Station, I could walk 10-15 minutes to Haymarket Station, so I attempted to do so. Somehow, I got epically lost and it took me 45 minutes. I still couldn't tell you how on earth I found it, I seriously was just wondering, praying that I eventually found it because I was LOST. I didn't recognize anything, none of the street names, I had no idea what direction I lived in, I didn't recognize any of the bus numbers even. And I forgot my sandwich in the fridge at home. Missed my train. Haymarket station sucks. SO I officially decided that I relinquish all rights to complain about the 30 minute bus ride to Waverley station, because that is what I will be doing from now on.

Once I got to work, everyone realized that since Annmargaret was back from holiday... I didn't have a computer to do my work. Everything we do is on the computers. Everything. We use Microsoft Outlook for email too, so I can't just hop on and check my email on someone else's, we have to log out of the security system, log back in etc etc. I basically had nothing to do all day, besides sort mail and alphabetize things. Finally at 3 Norma was like, "Claire, you should just go..."

So I did.

At that point, it got a little sunnier. I walked over to the shopping centre and bought a beach towel and sunscreen for my TRIP TO MALTA. Retail therapy works, people. I also talked to Mandi and we decided to go out to dinner, so I jumped on a train. Edinburgh was sunny and beautiful when I got back and met the Bairds at Prince's Street Gardens. We wandered around for awhile- they had to go to the apartment to get Daniel's wallet to get money out of the bank or something ridiculously complicated like that- and we all whined for awhile. None of us had a very good Monday. We finally decided to go to a French Restaurant, Café Rouge.

Uhhhhh possibly one of the top decisions of my life.

We were all hungry and a little impatient for the food until Daniel ordered a basket of assorted breads. That held us over, so we could just chat and have fun. And chat and have fun we did! We were at the restaurant for about 2.5-3 hours. I ordered bouillabaisse- amazing. Mandi had Poulet Breton and Daniel got a cheese souffle. It was all scrumptious. DELICIOUS, I tell you. Probably the best meal I've had since I came here, at least.

And it doesn't end there.

We took one look at the dessert menu and said, "Yes, please..." We got three desserts and shared them- Mandi has a picture I'll steal ASAP. Mandi got a Gauffre Belle Hélène- it was a waffle topped with white chocolate ice cream with white chocolate chips, a dark chocolate sauce, and a cooked pear. Daniel ordered crème brûlée. I ordered Coupe Rouge- white chocolate ice cream and raspberry sorbet with crème fraîche, fresh berries, and a red fruits coulis.

I think we all died of happiness. I will not torture you with descriptions of deliciousness, but just know... you WISH you had been there.

Anyway, we all know that nothing makes Claire happier than French desserts, so I was pretty cheered up. We decided to take a stroll because it was still light outside, and this is when I was like, "Oh, I decided I actually love Edinburgh again." Daniel and Mandi live near the restaurant we went to, in an area called 'New Town' and I love it. It is just beautiful. The days here are also really long, so it was still sunny. We went back to their apartment and played games for awhile, then Mandi and I just hang out and chatted while Daniel practiced the canter and went to bed. We didn't even notice how late it was because the sun was still setting- sunsets here last for hours. It is magic. MAGIC.

Yesterday was one of those days where it goes from crappy to wonderful so quickly you practically get whiplash...and I loved it. :)

Weekend Update

2011-06-14T11:41:00.001-06:00

Oh Seth Meyers, how I miss you.

Anyway.

Remember on Saturday when I said I was going to go check out some shops?

I guess I lied. I went into the kitchen to invite Alisse and Heather, but Alisse told me that they were going to go to an art show for one of the YSA guys. After talking it out, we decided to run to Tesco to get ingredients for our german dessert making parrrrtay Sunday, then we'd run to the art show, then check out some shops, THEN go to a party for Ian (art show YSA guy) then come home...

We went to Tesco then headed to the art show. It was a student showcase for the term. It was pretty cool because there was a section on interior design, fashion, illustration, graphic design, photography, etc etc. We spent a freakin long time there though... Ben put it very succintly, "I think I've looked at everything at least twice, can we go?"

It was miserably rainy so we decided to get some hot chocolate at a wonderful establishment called "Chocolate Soup." How could a place called Chocolate Soup be bad, honestly? It was scrumptious hazelnut hot chocolate, and I got to drink it while watching stag parties and roller derby conventions walking up and down the Royal Mile. I love my life. Then we went to a real grocery store (I normally go to Tesco Expresses, because they are closer, but have a really limited selection) which was magical. Then.....skype date. :)

Sunday was a great day. Church was good- I was looking forward to Sunday School, but Mandi asked me to help out in Nursery...so I did! We have fun in there, but sometimes it is really awkward because the parents just come in and play with their kids. You can't really play with the kid, because the mom is...and you just sit there...

The best is when the singing time lady comes in and there are 5 adults and 3 children, and its the adults that are singing and doing the actions and the kids just stare at you. Haha I really don't mind going to nursery as long as Mandi and I get to catch up. One of the little boys, Sammy, was just the cutest thing. His mom is from Edinburgh and his dad is from Denmark, which is where their family lives. They were in town for a family wedding. The dad came in and sat with us while his son played- he was really funny. He asked where we were from and as soon as I said Utah, he just withdrew. Mandi mentioned Pennsylvania and goes, "That's more like it!" Then he asked if we were Republicans or Democrats. When I told him I was a democrat, he became my friend again, but insisted that he was probably further left than I was. I told him he was probably right, but that I was pretty liberal...I even like Obama. He asked if my parents had disowned me because I was a democrat...How does he know so much about Utah!? Haha. He was awesome.

Originally, the plan for after church was for Daniel, Mandi, and Tilo to come over and we were going to make german desserts...and asparagus. Tilo's family owns an asparagus farm in Germany, and he just got some sent to him. However...Daniel, Mandi and I decided that we really wanted to go to the Royal Botanical Gardens.

Lesson you should take from this: Royal Botanical Gardens > asparagus.

It was a great day, warm but overcast. These gardens are HUUUUUUGE. I love huge English gardens you can just roam around in for hours. (I guess I shouldn't call them English, because this is Scotland...but its a style of garden...okay? Don't hurt me, Scottish friends) We watched the ducks, and found some waterfalls, considered crashing a birthday party, played in tree forts, and made plans to come back and read fairy tales. I just wish I had come a little earlier when more of the flowers were in bloom.

Mandi and I were parched after our strenuous walk, so we got water and ice cream then headed over to the Harry Potter Castle.

Ok, it is really called Fettes College buuuuut according to Daniel, it is how JK Rowling imagined Hogwarts when she was writing the Harry Potter series- remember how she wrote the first one here in Edinburgh? Yeah, cool.

I asked Daniel to take a picture of Mandi and I...so he took a lovely artistic shot of his feet. Isn't he helpful?

Then he took this beauty. He never counts to 3 or anything, he just holds the camera in your general direction for 5 minutes and you just have to hope the stars align and he took a picture when you were actually paying attention. It rarely happens, as seen by the above picture.

A little better... but my eyes are closed. Other than that...

Who wants to come to school here? *Raises hand*

Good work, Daniel. At last.

Haha, he's never going to take another picture for me again.

I'm not dead yet!

2011-06-11T07:20:00.001-06:00

This is just a post to let you know that I am not dead.

I just have nothing exciting to tell you.

This week, I'll I've done is go to work. Its been a pretty good week at work, I've been kept really busy. That might not sound fun, but honestly, sitting at a computer with nothing to do for hours is really not enjoyable. Even if I'm sorting mail or emailing/calling people rejecting their invitations for Angela, I'd rather be busy.

On Monday we had FHE...ha. It was actually really fun. After Alisse's lesson, which was really good, we went and played "teamwork" games. I was lucky enough to be on a team with Jamie (the guy who came to my rescue and drove me to the ER) and Ben, who are hysterical, and also Sarah, who is one of my favorite YSA people. Also... another girl, but I didn't catch her name. The first activity involved trying to create a structure that would protect an egg when we threw it across the room. We dominated with some paper plate/balloon/plastic cup/streamer monstrosity we called "The Jellyfish." Then we had to try and get across the cultural hall without touching the ground with 2 chairs and a small table. Ben had this BRILLIANT idea that the other girl and I (Sarah sat out) should just get on his and Jamie's backs, and then they would crouch on the chairs, scoot across the room, scoot back, grab the table, scoot back while dragging the table... I immediately knew this was not a good plan, and refused. We lost a lot of time trying to convince him that it wouldn't work, so when I finally had the idea to turn the table upside down to be able to get on and off it faster, we were too far behind.

The last round involved that game where you and a partner line up across from each other, lobbing an egg back and forth. You take a step back for every time you catch the egg. My teammate dropped the egg on the third throw, but I was really relieved- I was still in my work clothes and do not trust my washing machine to get egg out of a beaded J. Crew tank. Ben and Jamie rocked it out and took home the gold for our team.

Tuesday I had planned on going to the ceilidh, but I fell asleep and woke up right as it was starting- if you show up even 5 minutes late, all the spots are sold out. Sad day.

Wednesday was the first day of the new Institute session. It was really good, it's going to be on scripture study. That's actually the first Institute class I ever took...before I switched because after two weeks, all we'd done is play getting-to-know-you games. Does that make me a horrible person? Anyway, it is kind of difficult, because I just have the scriptures on my iPod. I didn't bring my actual set because they were too heavy, buuut I'm sure it will be just fine. After Institute, we had a great dinner- the Connellys are going to cook for us every week, how sweet is that? I told you they were nice people.

Thursday... I GOT A PACKAGE FROM HOME!! It was so nice. My mom sent me protein bars, some shoes, Scotland guides... and the most exciting parts...

Playtex Tampons

and

2 waterproof jackets.

If talk of tampons scares you, you may skip the next paragraph.

For some reason, all you can find in this country are Tampex tampons. Tampex is evil and probably manufactured by people who think that women deserve to be punished because Eve made Adam eat the apple. Also, there are a lot of applicator-less tampons and cardboard applicators in this country. This is a problem. So, my mom sent me Playtex tampons. That is love, my friends.

Ok, no more tampon talk.

The waterproof jackets are my new best friends, because it means I no longer have to wear my BRIGHT YELLOW ALEX SALMOND FOR FIRST MINISTER I'M SO FREAKING YELLOW AND BRIGHT AHHHH!!!!! jacket. Now, I have a nice green waterproof jacket with a real hood, and a black one as well that I can wear to work. With the Alex Salmond jacket, you had to hold down the side tassel-y things to get the hood to stay on, which sometimes ends up in you not being able to see. I enclose two pictures for your convenience.

Nice jacket, actually fits, actually warm, real hood, color doesn't make people stare at you= happy Claire

Size XXL, no warmth, people stare at me when I wear it, the hood impairs my vision and makes me look like a cone head... as Jared put it, "That piece of crap is only going to come in handy if you get lost in the Highlands and a helicopter is trying to find you."

Friday, I went to a surgery with team Constance, then did some shopping for Malta....then went to bed early. I know how to party.

Ok, really, I just have no one to hang out with, as Daniel and Mandi were still in the Highlands, Danny is in Albania, I don't have Brenden's number, and I never know what Heather and Alisse are up to.

Anyway, I think I'm going to go out in the lovely weather (its horrible, actually) in my new raincoat and hit up some stores. Later, mes amis.

Uh...

2011-06-07T09:23:00.000-06:00

So, cool story.

I was about to write a post about the ridiculous work I had to do today-write up a directory with:

contact details
number of employees
a general outline of what the company does
and 'listed activities'

for all the companies within the constituency that fall in the Aerospace, Defence, and Marine Sector.

It was mind-numbingly horrible, so I wanted to post an example of some of the technical jargon I had to wade through.

So I hit save, opened up this tab, went back into the document to copy and paste a paragraph in...but then...Word froze.

And then... Word unexpectedly quit.

The last file it can recover? The one I saved...yesterday. Out of all the things I was supposed to include, all it has in it are the general outlines...for half of the companies.

*headdesk*

Please, someone, weep for me.

My week in exile

2011-06-05T10:41:00.001-06:00

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I spent an hour typing up a blog post, and...it failed to post, then disappeared. Arlkajg;kldjkl;afjklajdflkajdf. Good thing I like you people.

I spent Tuesday-Friday in the constituency office about a half hour outside of Edinburgh. I really felt like I was in exile, because I never saw ANYONE. I really had these slow motion daydreams imagining what it was like back at Parliament- everyone laughing, eating great food, planning fun things to do after work, blah blah blah. I normally have these when Norma and I are eating lunch in separate rooms at our computers. :( Apparently Parliament isn't really like that without me, but still. I feel so alone... haha.

My schedule when I go to Livingston is as follows:

Wake up at the crack of dawn because the sun practically rises IN MY ROOM and I don't have curtains. Doze for a few more hours, talk to Jared on Skype, get ready, leave for work. 30 minute bus ride to the train station, 30 minute train ride to Livingston. Normally Norma is able to pick me up at the train station, but sometimes she can't because her daughter borrows her car. On those days, I wait for the bus (up to a 25 minute wait) and take it to the Livingston Almondvale Shopping Centre (15-30 minute bus ride, depending on the route) then walk the 5 minutes to work. All that in reverse to get home again. It really cuts a lot of time out of what I would normally be working.

Tuesday and Friday were pretty busy days, but Wednesday and Thursday were really slow. Norma said that tomorrow we'd go through all the current cases and pick a bunch out for me, and that we'd walk through how to do each of them and I could take them over. I'm hoping that I can just go out there Monday, Thursday, and Friday and stay in Edinburgh at Parliament for Tuesday and Wednesday because I feel like it is way more efficient...and I'm lonely.

I did have a movie night with Daniel and Mandi on Wednesday! We had pizza and soda and watched The King's Speech. It was really fun, they really are my favorite people. I don't know what I would do without those two, especially Mandi! We have so much fun together, and I'm already bummed that they are moving to North Carolina for grad school once we get back to Utah.

Friday was a beautiful day here in Edinburgh. I decided to go for a run along the canal...

I immediately remembered why I loathe running outside and only exercise in gyms. It's mainly so I can read a book and have my iPod, so that I can distract myself as much as possible from how much running sucks. Also, when you exercise inside, there isn't any nature. This means I don't have to feel like I'm running and only able to breathe through a straw...a straw made of pollen and dirt. Also horrible about running outside? You have to carry everything you need with you. There's no locker to store your stuff out in nature. Sooo I had to string my keys around my neck and tuck them into my shirt, and carry my iPod. No water, no inhaler, no cell phone, no ID (my mom always told me to go running with some form of identification in case a mountain lion-or crazy person, I suppose- mauled my body beyond recognition.) Buuuut for all my complaining, its pretty much the only way I can exercise, so I'll probably still do it. Oooooor... I'll just eat standing up, because you burn more calories that way.

Then again, I did just book a trip to Malta, and I need to buy a swimming suit, so maybe I'll find a way to suffer through it.

PS... This is Malta. I'm excited.

MOAR BANK HOLIDAY!

2011-06-05T08:36:00.000-06:00

If you think I'm a fool for spelling "more" like "MOAR" just go educate yourself by reading every.single.post of Hyperbole and a Half.

Anyway.

As you might have guess, Monday was also a bank holiday. I love this country.

We still had one day left on our explorer passes, so Daniel, Mandi and I decided to go to Linlithgow Palace and Blackness Castle. I forgot to charge my camera after my weekend trip, so I didn't take many pictures. It's a shame, because these were probably the coolest castles we'd been to.

I was supposed to meet Daniel and Mandi at Princes Street for the 9:12 bus to Linlithgow. I arrived at Princes Street at 8:50 ish, so I ran into a pharmacy to grab some ibuprofen and a water bottle. It takes 5 minutes until I'm back outside, then I just decided to head to the bus stop. Right then I get a text from Mandi, "Hey Daniel and I just got on a bus, at the stop across from NEXT. If you get on the next one we'll wait for you in Linlithgow!"

Uhhhh...

I was like, "Oh crap, I missed the bus, I was late!" But really, I was across the street from the bus and 10 minutes early, there were just a lot of buses coming and going for Linlithgow. Apparently Daniel got a little excited and jumped on the bus with no thought of abandoning me, while Mandi was like, "Uhhhh what about Claire?!"

Mandi's got my back.

So yeah, I just hopped on the next bus. I was exhausted and was on the verge of falling asleep, but the idea of missing my stop had me paranoid enough to stay awake. Except that I didn't know what my stop looked like...or was called...or anything... Apparently I'm really good at guessing thought, because it all worked out.

Anyway, Linlithgow Palace...legit. Most of the castles we went to over the weekend were ruins, so you couldn't walk around on all the different floors, etc but you could at Linlithgow! I mean, Linlithgow doesn't have a roof, but you can't really hold that against the place. Mary Queen of Scots was born here. People can get married here. It had window seats and fireplaces bigger than my room back in Logan. Daniel was pretending to sword fight some ruffians and Mandi and I decided it would be really cool to sleep over there. I told Daniel about Humans vs. Zombies at USU, and how I happened to be dating the leader of the Human Resistance. He thought that was pretty cool, and we all decided they should have some sort of Humans vs Zombies sleepover party in Linlithgow Palace. Who's in?

Here are some photos. My camera was on the verge of dying most of the day since I forgot to charge it after the weekend trip, so most of these are stolen, as usual, from Mandi and Daniel.

I took this picture for Brenden, because he likes unicorns. :)

After exploring Linlithgow we decided to head to Blackness Castle, which was just a short bus ride away. The bus came really infrequently, so we had time to kill. My Parisienne super power-finding chocolate shops- kicked in, and then we had some bleh food at a local pub, served by a man who was most definitely hung over...or possibly high? Maybe both.

We got to Blackness (prounounced Black Ness, like Loch Ness, not like, the property of being black.) and the bus driver told us that the next bus would be leaving 3 and a half hours later...or he'd stick around for 25 minutes before leaving. We were really bummed, because the castle was a 5-10 minute walk away from the bus stop, but we didn't really want to hang out for 3 hours. We took some pictures, sped over to the castle, ran around, and sped back to the bus stop. Luckily we got in for free with the explorer pass, because otherwise it would have been a waste!

We headed back to Edinburgh, and the day was GORGEOUS, so even though we were all tired (Daniel and Mandi fell asleep on the bus haha) we had to stay out. We spent about 3 hours, until the shops closed at 6, perusing some vintage shops. Daniel was pretending to be our gay friend giving us fashion advice... I found it hysterical, but apparently it isn't that funny when your husband is pretending to be homosexual. Haha. It was a lot of fun, and Mandi and I are planning a day to go without Daniel so we can do some serious shopping! I'm trying to decide if I could buy a vintage swimming suit... They are so much more flattering than modern swimming suits, but I just don't know if I can buy a previously owned and worn swimming suit... It just seems wrong.

Alright, I'm failing at staying up to date on these blog posts, guys, sorry! I'm almost a week behind!

Photo Overload

2011-06-04T15:46:00.002-06:00

All of these pictures are ones that Brenden took on our Southern Scotland weekend. I just thought they were all so great, and he was way more diligent at taking pictures than I was. Somehow, when I uploaded them they got all out of order, so maybe at some point I'll edit this post and tell you where they're from. Until then, just...look at how pretty Scotland is! :)

View from Threave Castle

Kelso Abbey

Sweetheart Abbey

Gardens at Floors Castle

This is where we stopped to take pictures of the waterfall and scampered up a mountain in the rain.

Sweetheart Abbey

Cardoness Castle

Wandering the grounds at Caelaverock Castle

Floors Castle

Melrose Abbey

Caelaverock Castle...and moat, which Mandi was very excited about

This is where Robert the Bruce's heart is buried.

Brenden was originally wearing more gender appropriate clothing, but decided he needed something "with a little more color." This is also the photo which received the "Haha. Claire looks dead" remarks. In my defense...I was in the middle of blinking. Haha. My desire to entertain you all has overcome my sense of vanity. Also... are we sure that Brenden's hat is actually a hat? It looks like a grain sack to me. Danny actually IS wearing a grain sack, I think...

Kelso Abbey

The beach...obviously...

Melrose Abbey. I'm rather angry at that picnic table for existing, because this shot is awesome.

More Melrose

More Kelso Abbey...

The headless dead bird at Kelso Abbey is very artistically captured here, Brenden, good job...

Sweetheart Abbey

View from the top of Melrose Abbey

Man, we really love Melrose Abbey, apparently

View of Floors Castle from the "nature walk" trail

Sweetheart Abbey

Castle-palooza

2011-06-03T12:18:00.000-06:00

Saturday started off right with a big Scottish breakfast. Mandi had been hyping up this "Big authentic Scottish breakfast" that came with the price of our room. We walked downstairs into the restaurant...and saw an arrangement of mini-cereal boxes, a jug of milk, a jug of OJ, and some oatmeal.

We were all bummed. We got some oatmeal, which was really good, sat down and discovered menus to order off the grill. We were happy again.

It was just a list of various items and you could order as much as you wanted. Fruit pudding, black pudding, haggis, bacon, sausage, eggs, mushrooms, tomatoes, potato scones, fried bread, toast, etc. It was so good. I wish I could have finished everything I ordered, but I couldn't.

First stop of the day: Sweetheart Abbey.

Now, you would expect that this place would have a really cute story, right? Nope. I mean, Lady Devroguilla of Galloway did build it in memory of her husband. But they named it Sweetheart Abbey because, when she died, she was buried there...with her husbands embalmed heart. Nice. Very... sweet.

We then took a tour of the New Abbey Corn Mill. It was...meh. Interesting-ish. The best part was really the old tour guide hitting on Mandi the whole time, saying that if Daniel died while at the mill, he'd take her to Sweetheart Abbey and marry her. Isn't that nice of him?

This is where we hit Castle-palooza.

The first one we went to was Caelaverock Castle. It had a children's center that we took advantage of... we dressed up in medieval clothes and took pictures. They're all on Brenden's camera, though, so you don't get to experience the magic. I haven't seen them, but Brenden and Mandi were looking at them when I hear them snicker and say, "Hahahaha. Claire looks like she's dead." So you probably won't get to see them regardless of if I ever get them. Mandi and I also colored our own heralds. We liked the children's center...

Anyway.

I don't know if you can tell by the previous pictures, but Saturday was not as nice as Friday was. Actually, sometimes it was gorgeous outside. Those were the 30 minutes intervals when we were driving from castle to castle. Literally, without exaggeration, every single time we would park the car and get out, it would start raining. Right when we were headed back to the parking lot, the skies would clear and it would be beautiful.

Someone pissed Mother Nature off.

Let's be honest, it was probably me.

Anyway, so yes, the weather was not as nice, but I learned my lesson from my last weekend tour, and brought a waterproof jacket. Unfortunately, the only waterproof jacket I own (besides my trench rain coat without a hood, which is good for style purposes mainly) is my BRIGHT YELLOW SNP RE-ELECT ALEX SALMOND SIZE XXL (it was the only size they had left by the time I arrived in the country) WATERPROOF JACKET!!!!!!!!!!

Do you feel like I am yelling at you? Well, that is because that jacket is so yellow, that I feel like it is always yelling at me. And its huge. And everyone laughs at me when I wear it.

After Caelaverock Castle, we headed to Threve Castle. We had to take a little boat to it, because it's on an island in the middle of the river.

On our way TO Threave Castle. You can tell, because it's grey and raining.

LEAVING Threave Castle...you can tell, because its sunny and the sky is blue.

Cool story about these last two castles. A week or so ago, my dad emailed me saying that he had talked to my aunt and found out that our family clan was the Maxwell clan. At work when I got back from this trip, I had a little down time so I decided to look them up. I clicked on the Wikipedia page and scrolled through. Down at the bottom, I noticed a castle that looked really familiar... Oh, it was Caelaverock Castle! Apparently is was the seat of the head of the Maxwell clan. Threave Castle was also owned by the Maxwell clan. I think I should have gotten something to commemorate the occasion of my homecoming, like one of those souvenir smashed pennies or something. Alas, I didn't know until I was already back in Edinburgh.

Next was Cardoness Castle. We were castled out, and it was POURING rain, so I didn't take any pictures. I apologize.

At this point, it was 5 PM so everything shut down. We started to head back to Edinburgh, but passed a beach that Daniel really wanted to stop at. It was sunny, so we decided to take a chance and go frolic for a bit. Mother Nature wasn't mad at me any more, apparently, because it stayed sunny!

Ok, can we look at this cool picture I took of Daniel? Look below to see how he returns the favor.

Worst. Picture. Ever.

After the beach stop, we just headed back to Edinburgh Airport, then got on a bus for 45 minutes back into town. We were all SO tired. Heather got on the same bus we were on (the 35 goes to work, ASDA, and the airport) and when we were walking home together she goes, "You guys looked like you all wanted to die."

For some reason, road trips are super exhausting.

It was SUCH a good time, though. I really had a lot of fun. Daniel and Mandi are two of my favorite people ever, I love hanging out with them. It was also nice to get to know Brenden a little better- before this, I'd hung out with him the least. His stories kept us entertained all weekend long. And chill, easy going Danny who always lets me use his coat as a blanket... We're quite the fun crowd, if I do say so myself.